*REFS* Please delete the above if possible. I had no idea the scope of this disaster. Jokes are in terrible taste, especially to score political points. I came back to delete it but it was too late.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
Does MAGA not get how retarded Trump’s ideas are? He’s an imbecile. Luckily he’s just the distraction. Y’all ain’t getting a damn thing the billionaires don’t want. No mass deportations for farming corps, tech corps etc. Matter of fact, Trump backs Elons call for more HB1 visas for tech because “Murican’s is too stoopid” to work for silicon valley. His fellow Doge(r) Vivek Rammyhammyswammy says it has to be Indians in those jobs because of our love of sports and popular kids at our proms over hoisting scholarship to the most honored trait… these are your UNCHOSEN UNREGULATED UNOFFICIAL presidents 2 and 3 who will undoubtedly call all the shots while dementia don trots out the greatest hits for distraction. Good luck with what you have wrought.
You voted for less. Less opportunity, less pay, less healthcare coverage, less truth, less housing, less education, less vaccines for horrible crippling ailments, and less social safety-net. No tax on overtime was word play for ending all overtime. Dumb doesn’t begin to describe this kind of treachery. But $25 a dozen eggs sound great to me, not because I can afford them, but because many of the MAGA voters won’t. And when the robots get here, we’ll all get to fight over garbage found food from the elite anyway. They can’t deport those who scare them most, so they are gonna starve you out. Bank on it.
A MAGAt burning a cyber truck in front of demented D’s trademark was a message well sent. Between that and glee over the UHC CEO assassination, the elite are prepared to be deadly aggressive while Trump exists to blame the fall of America on.
The pinko kool-aid corners of his mouth give him away. The de’ facto interim furor has to stay close to Trump to protect his investment. He can’t let the maga influencers have trumps ear. That’s the best buds act. Dementia Don was going down in flames and Elon saw a chance to be president, a job he knew was something he could never truly hold. That is the only thing I see in Elon. Greed and opportunity is what billionaires thrive on. Nothing super about that.
That’s all you can come up with. That’s as old as great-great-grandpa’s bear-skin-condom and used just as much. You need fresh material and original thoughts… maybe you can rent some from a dem…
That smack back out of the way, I noticed you said you wanted to chill on the fighting… I’ll chill on attacks toward you personally. But not on the happy dances for MAGA crap, those I will always bash. And of course, I will always be nasty with anyone coming at me, so expect that. Otherwise, coexistence without the rhetoric is something I would prefer because we used to get along well. That’s the best olive branch I have to offer.
I'm more upset with you using that gif because that dude is on the Great British Baking Show, which is on in my house seemingly 24/7, and just seeing his face makes me angry.
Blue ostriches on crack float on milkshakes between the sidewalk titans of gurglefitz. --YTown
Well this place just got a whole lot more boring...
As if it was ever interesting. It’s been a vitriol filled game of wack-a-troll for almost a decade now. And it all started because I went too hard at 40 in another forum… the birth of Palus Politicus… it’s always been a joke as far as the exchange of ideas and political views goes. Entertaining at times, but continually devolving.
Canada can't/won't win a Stanley Cup because any player worth it heads to the US because of the tax implications.
But then there's the tariffs they have to worry about.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
I mean that is comic genius because the person that posted that is somebody that never expresses an original thought and only posts cut and paste from the media. Truly. Genius.
The more things change the more they stay the same.
To be fair, none of the major players (elected, appointed, or random billionaires who weren’t elected or appointed) have done a Nazi salute in the last 4 hours.
But you never know about the next 4 hours.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
Whether the memes speak a thousand words or not .... none of them are orignial thought. They are fed to him by social media and the MSM and he regurgitates them.
He then posts a meme about people being spoon fed what to say by the media.
It is without doubt pure comedy gold. It should be pinned to the top of the PP forum for eternity. A poliical joke that can never be topped.
Last edited by mgh888; 02/05/2504:25 AM.
The more things change the more they stay the same.
IRS workers who opted for the deferred resignation are being asked to stay on for the 2025 tax season.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
bro we haven't been in a real crisis like this since the great Toilet Paper crisis
“To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.”
“To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.”
Here is a joke for you. Trump declares he’ll put tariffs on all steel and aluminum imports… Makes the Gulf of America renaming official again, then orders Google to make the change on maps app. Reiterates Canada being the 51st state. Reiterates taking GAZA and owning it. Then asked about Elon’s financial disclosure being secret not public. He defends him. Then invites ONLY WHITE AFRICANS to immigrate here while canceling non-white protected immigrants and shipping them back to bad situations. Also, MAGA racism on display over the half time show.
Then news over growing protests around the country and around the world. Can’t wait until we march in and give MAGA the boot.
Then goes on to talking about Vance’s BS about not following federal court orders. Fascists.
Last night the man who's been tasked with gutting whole departments of the government (illegally since he needs congressional approval to actually do this), who wasn't elected or officially appointed, who just so happens to be a billionaire and the largest single contributor to the President's campaign lectured the nation from behind the oval office desk on the evils of bureaucracy/bureaucrats...
... while his son picked his nose on camera.
The line between truth and satire has never been blurrier.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
Meanwhile i see posts suggesting things for "Republicans" must be on track when Moscow Mitch agrees with the Dems. . . . Cant make this up. Trumptards are gonne trumptard.
The more things change the more they stay the same.
You’ve used “Trumptard” several times now, expect a ban. I get them all the time for retaliatory name calling, while the Trumptard posters get to continue.
You’ve used “Trumptard” several times now, expect a ban.
Why? Libtard had been spammed across this board for 8 years or more without repercussions and without a Republican or Trump supporter saying Boo. Whats good for the goose is good for the gander ....
The more things change the more they stay the same.
You’ve used “Trumptard” several times now, expect a ban.
Why? Libtard had been spammed across this board for 8 years or more without repercussions and without a Republican or Trump supporter saying Boo. Whats good for the goose is good for the gander ....
That word was really hammered by one poster, and (combined with the general lack of substance of her posts) it really only served to show that she wasn't worth engaging with... unless you just wanted to fling poo.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
Petition for Denmark to buy California for $1 trillion surpasses 200,000 signatures
A satirical online petition is catching the attention of both Californians and Danes alike.
As of Tuesday, the "Denmarkification" petition – which calls for the country of Denmark to buy the state of California – has collected more than 200,000 signatures.
The petition comes in response to President Trump's continued interest in purchasing Greenland, a territory of Denmark. In January, the president even talked about how he hasn't ruled out using military force to take control of both Greenland and the Panama Canal.
Greenland's leader, Múte B. Egede, has rebuffed the U.S. president's interest, saying his people don't want to be Americans.
Using tongue-in-cheek language, the Denmarkification petition argues that President Trump may be open to selling the state whose political leaders have often stood at odds with his administration.
"Let's be honest – Trump isn't exactly California's biggest fan. He's called it 'the most ruined state in the Union' and has feuded with its leaders for years," the petition states. "We're pretty sure he'd be willing to part with it for the right price."
Denmarkification organizers have set a goal of crowdfunding $1 trillion to buy California – but the petition is only collecting signatures, not donations.
With melting sea ice opening up new Arctic shipping routes, experts say Greenland's location is of particular strategic importance.
If California were to become another territory of Denmark, one city would seem to be a natural capital: Solvang, already known as the "Danish Capital of America."
I chuckled at the whole thing, but the lady at the end got me.
Last edited by oobernoober; 03/05/2504:15 PM.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
Rumor has it that The White House, in honor of Musk and Space X is now considering changing the name of what it had earlier renamned "The Gulf of America" to "The Gulf of Space Debris"
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In an emergency address from the Oval Office on Monday afternoon, Donald J. Trump commanded the American people not to check their 401k accounts.
“Anyone caught checking their 409s (sic) can and will be deported,” he warned.
Asserting that he was issuing this order “for your own good,” Trump added, "Elon says there's a virus in the stock market and if you check your stocks it will spread to your body."
Though he claimed that “nothing bad is happening on Wall Street,” he promised the American people that, in the event of a stock market crash, “I will fix it with my Sharpie.”
I stand in solidarity with Marjorie Taylor Green keeping her vaccination records private. That is personal information between her and her Veterinarian.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
The memes coming out from the Signal chat thing have been bangers.
There is no level of sucking we haven't seen; in fact, I'm pretty sure we hold the patents on a few levels of sucking NOBODY had seen until the past few years.
Support Grows for Trump Serving Third Term in Prison
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Support is growing for the notion of Donald J. Trump serving a third term in prison, a new poll released on Sunday indicates.
The poll, conducted by the Opinion Research Institute at the University of Minnesota, reveals that many Americans would like to see Trump serve such a third term even before his second term in the White House is over.
Davis Logsdon, who supervised the survey, said that poll respondents favor exploring “any way to make this happen,” including “a constitutional amendment permitting him to serve several such terms.”
Democratic Candidates Beg Musk to Visit Their States
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—A mad scramble erupted on Wednesday as hundreds of Democratic candidates across the nation begged Elon Musk to visit their states.
Democrats who previously thought their electoral prospects were dim pleaded with the South African businessman for a miracle that only his noxious presence can deliver.
Additionally, they implored Musk to don stereotypical regional headwear during his visit in the hopes of striking the most off-putting note possible.
“No one guarantees a Democratic victory like Elon Musk,” one party strategist said. “He fell apart in Wisconsin like a human Cybertruck.”
“Can you imagine you’re a parent and your son leaves the house and you say, ‘Jimmy, I love you so much, go have a good day in school,’ and your son comes back with a brutal operation? Can you even imagine this? What the hell is wrong with our country?” - Donald Trump
And that joke got elected president.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
"They're eating the checks! They're eating the balances!"
In other news..............
RFK Jr. Says Stock Market Crash Could be Reversed if Investors Drink Cod Liver Oil
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Offering a remedy to last week’s devastating crash on global stock markets, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. said on Monday that the plummeting trend could be reversed if investors would drink high doses of cod liver oil.
“Stocks are crashing because investors are in a bad mood, and the reason they are in a bad mood is because they are not getting enough Omega-3 fatty acids,” he said. “This is what caused the Great Depression.”
Bolstering the credibility of his suggestion, he added, “Dr. Oz is with me on this.”
Kennedy’s prescription, however, was met with skepticism from financial experts, who noted that tariffs on cod liver oil had made the liquid virtually unaffordable.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
Bondi Fires DOJ Employee After Finding Copy of Constitution on his Desk
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Calling it a “serious breach of the Department of Justice’s code of conduct,” on Wednesday Attorney General Pam Bondi announced that she had terminated a career DOJ employee who was caught with a copy of the U.S. Constitution on his desk.
Bondi said that the employee, who had worked at the department for 37 years, had “raised suspicions” by using “telltale phrases like ‘due process’” in DOJ memos.
At Bondi’s direction, US marshals ransacked his office, discovered the offending document, and frog-marched him out of the building.
Bondi took the opportunity to remind all DOJ staffers that the U.S. Constitution is on the Republican Party’s banned reading list.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
That's no joke - that's the entire Democratic platform in in 47 second twitter. . . . the only thing missing is them fir bombing Shapiro's house. I mean that was soooooo Libtard.
The more things change the more they stay the same.
“To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.”
Trump administration says Jerome Powell is a member of the gang MS-13. It demands ICE capture him and deport him to a prison in El Salvador on the next flight out.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
Harvard to Award Trump Honorary Doctorate for Making its Approval Rating Soar
CAMBRIDGE, MA (The Borowitz Report)—To show thanks for making its approval rating soar, Harvard University announced on Thursday that it would award Donald J. Trump an honorary doctorate.
The Ivy League institution, deeply despised by Americans since its founding in 1636, released a statement thanking Trump for his “game-changing service to Harvard.”
In the statement, Harvard said that it had received Trump’s biggest public relations boost since the one he bestowed on Volodymyr Zelenskyy in the Oval Office.
“Donald J. Trump may not have built a wall with Mexico or annexed Canada,” the statement read. “But he has done something far more monumental: made Americans like Harvard.”
Trump administration says Jerome Powell is a member of the gang MS-13. It demands ICE capture him and deport him to a prison in El Salvador on the next flight out.
Buddy of mine im the office is a huge Bulls fan. I was proud to let him know that he’s an MS-13 gang member.
Blue ostriches on crack float on milkshakes between the sidewalk titans of gurglefitz. --YTown
An injunction was filed Friday in court requesting that a restraining order be handed down and given to Kristi Noem stating she be required to stay no less than 500 feet away from all Homeland Security canine officers. It has been reported that some canine officers have been caused undo mental stress and feel threatened whenever she gets close to them. The judges decision on the restraining order is expected Monday.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
Trump Urges Vatican to Select New Pope from Cast of "Fox & Friends"
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “it’s the smartest way to go,” Donald J. Trump urged the Vatican on Monday to select the next pope from the cast of “Fox & Friends.”
“You want to have a pope who’s good on TV,” Trump said. “The ‘Fox & Friends’ people are the best TV people in the business.”
Trump seemed to disqualify co-host Ainsley Earhardt, commenting, “I don’t know if you can have a girl pope. No knock on Ainsley, but I don’t think people are ready for that.”
Alternatively, he added, "Maybe go with Doocy--he looks like he's never had sex."
VATICAN CITY (The Borowitz Report)—JD Vance will represent Satan at Pope Francis’s funeral this weekend, the Devil confirmed on Thursday.
In a rare public statement, the Prince of Darkness said that he could not attend the funeral himself because it conflicts with a Tesla board meeting.
Explaining his choice of Vance, Beelzebub said, “If you can’t have me, JD is the next best thing.”
But longtime Vatican-watcher Harland Dorrinson criticized Satan’s decision to send Vance, noting, “With Trump in attendance, this seems like overkill.”
Winning! Prices are going to go up about thirty percent by modest estimations! But we can all relax because Trump and the oligarchic elite will be fine. Happy day! Under his watchful eye.
Kentucky Derby winner Sovereignty turned down a meeting with trump. When asked why he replied, "If I wanted to see a horses ass I would have come in second."
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
To process the avalanche of bribes offered to him, the President has established a new Cabinet-level department, Group Receiving Inducements For Trump (GRIFT).
Presidents like Obama and Biden failed to create the infrastructure necessary to operate a world-class kleptocracy.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
A man walks up to a news stand in Dallas, Texas day after day. Every day he looks at the front page, curses and throws the newspaper in the trash.
Finally after this had been going on for over a month the man that runs the news stand becomes curious. So he asks the man, "What is it you keep looking for?"
"The obituary", says the man.
To which the man running the news stand replies, "Those are near the back of the newspaper".
The man that keeps looking at the front page says, "Not the one I'm looking for."
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
When Trump finally dies he goes to hell and gets greeted by the devil
Devil: Welcome Donald, you definitely belong here but we are currently full. Since you were such a good proponent for me while you were on earth, I will show you 3 rooms and let you choose who you will replace.
The devil show him room 1 and Obama is there pounding a rock with a sledge hammer. As soon as it is crushed, if re-assembles and he has to strt all over. Trump: I don't think I can do that for the rest of eternity, and I certainly don't want Obama to get out of hell, Next.
Room 2 - George Bush is pushing a rock up a hill. As soon as he gets to the top the rock immediately re-appears at the bottom and he has to start all over. Trump: Uh no, I can't do this for the rest of eternity
Room 3 - Bill Clinton is laying in bed, Monica Lewinsky come in and starts doing her Monica thing Trump: Oh yeah, I could get used to that
The devil then says: Okay Monica, you're free to go
Am I perfect? No Am I trying to be a better person? Also no