DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Tailgate Forum Post your favorite quotes.

Don't step on the Mome Raths - Lewis Carroll.

There are few people whom I truly love, and fewer still of whom I think well. - Jane Austen.

Sometimes you just have to pee in the sink. - Charles Bukowski.

Show me a man who lives alone and has a perpetually clean kitchen, and I'll show you a man with detestable spiritual qualities. - Charles Bukowski.

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. - Gandhi.

Honourable mention to the entire first page of Chuck Bariss' autobiography "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind", and perhaps a little of the second page.

"The car says, 'Moops'"

"60% of the time, it works every time."

"I need more cow bell!"


"That's what she said."

"The human torch was denied a bank loan."

"It's made of bits of real panther... So you know it's good."

$&*)^^!!!

Said for nearly 16 Sunday in the fall by every Browns fan.

"We don't need to fight...........to prove we're right!" by Mr. Pete Townsend

from the race *starter* in Cannonball Run...

Of course you know certain sceptics note that perhaps 10,000 of the nations's most elite highway patrolmen are out there waiting for us after we start, but let's stay positively: Think of the fact that there's not one state in the 50 that has the death penalty for speeding... although I'm not so sure about Ohio.


I always will remember that one...( I remember the funny ones and have a hard time being serious)..

Yes Sir!

President George W. Bush Quotes of Stupidity

"You work three jobs? … Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that." —to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005

"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." —Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

"They misunderestimated me." —Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000

"Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?" —Florence, S.C., Jan. 11, 2000

"There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again." —Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

And my number one Bush stupid quote is............................

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." —Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004

For when the One Great Scorer comes to write against your name, He marks - not that you won or lost - but how you played the Game...

- Grantland Rice

"Successful people plan for four generations. Unsuccessfull people plan for Saturday night."

".......Now watch this drive. "

Prince Phillip (Queens husband) is reknowned for tactless inappropriate comments:

"If it has four legs and it's not a chair, if it has two wings and it flies but it's not an airplane, and if it swims and it's not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it." - Said at a World Wildlife Fund function.


When talking to some british students in Oriental Asia he joked with them "you shouldn't stay here too long, or you'll turn slitty-eyed"


To a driving instructor he met during a stroll in Oban, Scotland:
"How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to get them past the test?"


Comment when someone suggested in 1967 that a trip to Russia might improve diplomatic relations between Great Britain and the Soviets:
"The bastards murdered half my family."


Said during a severe recession in 1981:
"Everybody was saying we must have more leisure. Now they're complaining they're unemployed."

On French Canadians during a visit to Toronto:
"I can't understand a word they say. They slur all their words."


To further insult Canadians during a royal visit:
"We don't come here for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves."


To grieving residents of Lockerbie, Scotland, during a 1993 visit after a plane exploded and crashed into the town, killing everyone on board and several people on the ground (and shortly after a fire swept through ONE wing of Windsor Castle):
"People usually say that after a fire it's the water damage that's the worst. We're STILL trying to dry out Windsor castle."


Whilst on a tour of a factory in northern England, Prince Philip pointed out a fuse box that looked quite old. He said "it looks like it was fitted by an Indian!"



On being introduced to the chairman of Britain's channel 4 television network:
"So YOU'RE responsible for the kind of crap channel 4 produces."


On Fergie, the Duchess of York:
"Her behavior was a bit odd. I don't see her because I do not see much point."


Do you still throw spears at each other?
-- (on meeting Aborigines in Australia)


You can't have been here that long, you haven't got a pot belly.
-- (as told to a Briton in Hungary)


"Do you know they have eating dogs for the anorexic now?" - Said to a blind woman with a guide dog.


You must be out of your minds.
To Solomon Islanders on being told that their population growth was 5% a year


You are a woman, aren't you?
Said in Kenya to a native woman who had presented him with a small gift.


Aren't most of you descended from pirates?
Said to an islander in the Cayman Islands


You managed not to get eaten, then?
Said to a student who had been trekking in Papua New Guinea


You were playing your instruments, weren't you? Or do you have tape recorders under your seats?
Said to a children's band in Australia


If you travel as much as we do you appreciate how much more comfortable aircraft have become. Unless you travel in something called economy class, which sounds ghastly.

Commenting during the Jubilee tour


French cooking's all very well, but they can't do a decent English breakfast. (2002)
Aboard the floating restaurant 'Il Punto' on the river Orwell in Ipswich, after thoroughly enjoying an excellent full English breakfast (Il Punto is owned by Frenchman Regis Crepy)



You look like you're ready for bed!
Said to the President of Nigeria, who was dressed in traditional robes



Edinburgh: And what exotic part of the world do you come from?
Lord Taylor: I'm from Birmingham. (1999)
An exchange with Lord Taylor of Warwick, who is black



"Brazilians live there"
Prince Philip on the "key problem" facing Brazil


"Do we need ear plugs?"
At the Royal Premiere of the James Bond film Die Another Day, on being told that Madonna sung the theme song.


The guy makes Bush seem eloquent.

Ben Franklin by far had the best quotes of all time:
Fun-wise:
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy
-Ben Franklin

Serious:
They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
-Ben Franklin

A lot of people need to read that

Last but not least:
He who controls the past controls the future, he who controls the present controls the past....
-1984

"Do or do not, there is no try" - Yoda, The Empire Strikes Back

"No, maybe I can't win. Maybe the only thing I can do is just take everything he's got. But to beat me, he's going to have to kill me. And to kill me, he's gonna have to have the heart to stand in front of me. And to do that, he's got to be willing to die himself. I don't know if he's ready to do that. I don't know." - Rocky Balboa, Rocky IV

"The only reason you're still conscious is cause I don't want to have to carry you." - Jack Bauer, 24

wow, that guy's a real prince....


If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose the courage to be, that quality that helps you to go on in spite of all. And so today, I still have a dream.
--Martin Luther King Jr.--

" When I die I want to be buried upside down so all my critics can kiss my ass"

Bob " Sug" Knight

"It's not the woman in your life that maters, it's the life in your woman.

“Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion.”

Gen. H. Norman Schwartzkopf

Sonia: I'd like to have three children.
Boris: Yes, one of each.

Sonia: I guess you could say I'm half-saint, half-whore.
Boris: Well, here's hoping I get the one that eats.

Diane Keaton as Sonia, Woody Allen as Boris in "Love and Death"

"Certainty of death, small chance of successs, what are we waiting for?" -Gimli

"It does not require a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless minority keen to set brush fires in people's minds" - Samuel Adams.

I'll kick your arse so hard you'll be able to wipe your ass and blow your nose with the same piece of tissue.
I hear that if you kick the s**t out of a Texan nothing is left but a pair of boots. Roy D. Mercer

"It's like that drug trip in that movie I saw when I was on that drug trip."
- Philip J, Fry

"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose : it's how drunk you get." -Homer Simpson

"The sooner kids talk the sooner they talk back."
-Homer Simpson

"I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse" - The Godfather

"In my opinion that sucked" - Jim Mora

Bill Paxton as Private Hudson in "Aliens"

"Maybe you haven't been keeping up on current events, but we just got our asses kicked, pal !"

Describes being a Browns fan pretty well,....

After the Browns creamed Tampa Bay:

interviewer: What do you think of your team's execution?
John McKay: I think it's a good idea.

The one in my sig, I love, obviously.
I'm also a big fan of a quote by the late, great Jim Croce, "If you dig it, do it. If you love it, do it again!"
My favorite movie trilogy is the Mad Max series, and a few of my faves are,
"Not enough runway..."
" The last of the V-8 Interceptors, be a shame to blow it up."
" Two days ago I saw a vehicle that could haul that tanker. You wanna get outta here? Talk to me."
" Those chains are high tensile steel. It'd take about ten minutes to hack through them with this. If you're lucky, you can get through your leg in five..."
And I love this one from Cool Hand Luke, "Nuttin! He beat ya wit' nuttin! Just like today, when you kept comin' at me with nuttin!"
"Yeah, well, sometimes, nothing is a pretty cool hand..."
And, finally, on football, Jim Mora Sr., "PLAYOFFS?!?!?"

"It is a tale told by an idiot. Full of sound and fury; signifying nothing."

Shakespeare

Campaign advisor to presidential candidate, Adlai Stevenson: "You have the thinking man's vote, sir."

Adlai Stevenson: "That's not good enough, I need a majority."

"Life is real; life is earnest;
and the grave is not it's goal.
Dust thou art; to dust returneth
was not spoken of the Soul."

Longfellow

j/c

No, not a famous person quote, just my favorite: Dad, you were right.

Next favorite "saying"? "Wanna beer?".

Quote:

---

"Wanna beer?".

---

Yes

Quote:

---

"Wanna beer?".

---

Hard to beat that one......


But: If ya anit first...your last.....


Git-R-Done...

The worst day hunting, still beat's the best day at work.

Quote:

---

The worst day hunting, still beat's the best day at work.

---

Classic....How true it is.....

"You cant have two number ones...nope, cuz thatd make eleven!"


But really...my two favorites of all time

First from Glory Road
"If you quit today, you quit Every day for the rest of your life."

and from the late, great and my hero Jim Valvano.
"Dont Give Up...Don't Ever Give Up."

From Sparky Griswald about his boss, Frank Shirley...

" I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane, with all the other rich people, and I want him brought right here with a big ribbon on his head. And, I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no good, rotten, floor-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed, sack of monkey sh** he is! Hallelujah! Holly Sh**! Where's the Tylenol?