I have never been the sharped knife in the crayon box Clem
But I am damn persistent.
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly… and for the same reason.
An Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand and pulling a male buffalo with the other. He says to the waiter: "Want coffee." The waiter says, "Sure Chief. Coming right up." He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee..... The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere and then just walks out. The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand, pulling another male buffalo with the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter: "Want coffee." The waiter says, "Whoa, Tonto! We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?" The Indian smiles and proudly says, "Training for position in United States Congress. Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave mess for others to clean up, Disappear for rest of day."
When an unpopular President completed his presidency, he wanted a special postage stamp issued with his picture on it. He stressed that it should be of international quality. The stamps were duly released and the former President was pleased. But within a couple of days of release of the stamp, he began hearing complaints that the stamp was not sticking properly, and he was furious. So he ordered an investigation into the matter. The investigator checked the problem out at several post offices, and then reported to the former President. The results revealed that there was nothing wrong with the quality of the stamp. The problem was that people were spitting on the wrong side.
