DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Palus Politicus Why kids are growing up to be snowflakes.

After 2 swats your ass only had one color RED

Until two days later when it turned blue/red then yellow/green

There are no words in the English language that instill such fear as...

"Go cut me a switch."

The ultimate punishment: being forced to procure one's own implement of discipline.

Ya'll just don't know how good you had it.


#hardcoreparenting

Didn't Adrian Peterson do time for that?

He never actually served any time on it .

My stepfather was the type of guy that would leave little 'points' from the twigs he cut off...

He'd take you by the arm, walk you around in a circle two maybe three times, stare out the window, and then let loose...

Yes, he went to court for it, at least.
Doing time? I don't remember about that.

Hard to think of our parents as criminals ain't it?

At our crib, the worst was The Belt.
Reserved for heinous crimes.

Here's the thing: there was a hierarchy of punishments that fit crimes. That list was clearly spelled out. SO.... every time you did something that ran against the household code, you already knew what the payment would be. That was empowering, in a way- because the kid had the choice to risk the punishment (if caught) or choose another course of action.

Here's how it went...

[Pops]: "You knew what would happen if you did this and got caught, didn't you?"
[me]: "Yes, sir."
[Pops]: "And you made a choice to do it anyway, didn't you?
[me]: "Yes, sir."
[Pops]: "So is your punishment unfair?"
[me]: "No, sir."
[Pops]: "Then let's get this over with, so we can get on with our lives, right?
[me]: "yes, sir."

IMHO, this was as humane and common-sense a way to deal with home discipline as could be set up. The punishment was never administered from a place of anger or loss of control. The child knew going in what the risks were. And when it was over, it was over. Life moved on. Most punishments never involved striking of any sort. Loss of privileges, extra chores, loss of weekend pay (we NEVER got an allowance), community (neighborhood) service were the norm. It was a fair and just system in our house. We were never punished for undisclosed rules, but when those circumstances arouse, there'd be a family sit-down... and new rules were added to the 'family household code of criminal conduct'... and we'd be expected to abide by the new rule henceforth.

__________________

The worst one was the time I stole a Spiderman comic book from the local Drug Store, but that's a story for another day.

Yes.

See my above response to Ted for some context.

I knew guys that got bones broken by their dad...makes ya wonder what happened to generations before them.

I can't pick a worst time...

I remember when the AP thing happened I thought to myself, ohhh I went through that...500 feet down the road (at 45mph) I thought to myself, should I have had to?

Broken bones are instances of abuse.

Break a stranger's bones at work or in a bar... yerazz is behind bars, and rightfully so. A parent who maims and disfigures his kid shouldn't be in charge of said kid.

I understand that we have sliding slopes that blur the lines between discipline and abuse, but broken bones means the adult was not in control of themselves at that moment.

I don't care if the kid stole the neighbor's bike, lawn mower or car... (s)he shouldn't spend the next 6-8 weeks in a cast.

.02

I agree, I also don't know what happened to their fathers as a result of it, but that kind of thing happened a lot.

My stepfather used to sit in his chair and tell me when I turned 16 he would beat my ass just for the hell of it, he wasn't around long enough for us to find out what would've happened.

See? Yet again, we're very similar. My dad wasn't a cop though. My mom was a teacher. It's amazing how fast word spreads amongst teachers, even if they're not in the same building.

I never got paddled at school though.

I remember a time when I was around 15 years of age and my brother and I got into it. We were mostly wrestling but going hard. Then he hit me on the back of my head which made me furious, I poured it on him when Wham, again on the head.

Turns out while we were fighting and rolling around on the floor, Mom had entered the room with the large ladle and was hitting us on our heads. We laughed at the fact it made us fight harder thinking the other was getting the upper hand. It did lump us up a bit but Mom made her point known.

That's so adorable! My grandmother was a small West (by God) Virginian and she didn't take no crap!

We regularly got spanked by her, but it was a spanking, wasn't abusive.

I stopped getting 'spankings' from My Momz when she broke a ping-pong paddle across my arse, and the scene itself made me laugh out loud. She just stood there, shocked... staring at the handle in her right hand. I totally lost it.

Now... I was a 'good boy'... and later apologized to her for doing whatever it was that earned me the smacks... but I also added:

"You gotta admit, Mom... seeing that half of the paddle flying across the basement really WAS funny, wasn't it?"

She still saw no humor in it... and I apologized a second time.

Weeks later, the entire family was in tears, as we recounted the story together.

Of that, there has never been a doubt.

My dad had (still has?) the same leather belt since the early 80's. There are 2 whoopins I still remember to this day at age 39.

1) For no other reason than I wanted to see how it worked... at the age of 6, I gave this random dude the middle finger. When my dad got home... man... it still sends chills lol

2) Around the same age, I once found a circular metal disk with what appeared to be plugs. I asked my dad what it was for. He started to say something about it being used for electrical work, but I cut him off, said "Oh, I know!", immediately ran into my bedroom and stuck it in to a live outlet.

After the sparks, he whooped me good.

Wanna know just how good?

Fast forward to 29 Palms, CA... Marine Corp Communications and Electronics School over 20 years later... I'm taking a practical application test and I have a voltmeter trying to figure out why this machine won't turn on. I trace it back to what appears to be the wall outlet. I just stood there for several minutes, staring, as my arse started stinging from the memory of the last time I stuck something other than a plug in to an outlet! No joke!


It's been amazing to see how schools have changed. I went to highschool in the 90's... it was a suburban, mostly rural school. I remember the gym teacher dragging dudes by the throat to the principals office after smarting off to him. No one ever complained about the gym teacher.

39?
39!!!

Dawg... you be drinkin' from that (aluminium) can that reads:

"Ol' Skool- Lite."





(Love the post, Dawg. Don't stop)

I have many thoughts about this subject.

Let's just say that there are many different parenting styles and that to raise children properly, most parents are poorly equipped or apply rules that should not apply.

I have major problems with participation trophies, helicopter parents and all of the other "over-parenting" strategies that are out there. We need to understand that all kids are not equal, but they will find their equilibrium if given a chance.

One area that we forget is the ability to fundamentally respect other individuals. If we are not taught to do this, we wind up with self centered people who are more focused about themselves, instead of working with other people. Social media and video games become inhibitors of social development.

We need to understand that you can't be whatever you want to be, as long as you try... The gene pool does not work that way. Some are more athletic, some more academic, and others fall short in both areas, no matter how much effort is given. That said, many can be functional adults, but that is different.

There are other kids that are less fortunate, and they grow up without a parenting structure that is really needed for their development. For those, they need an advocate, a role model something else than social media and video games.

Many kids from more affluent families have their ways paved for them. They take the freeway to success. Others have to fight tooth and nail, and the competition hones their skills. But they can and do make it.

I have seen moth ends of the spectrum, young and old, motivated individuals and slackers, and what I have learned to do is look past everything and figure out who the person is before passing judgement. I have encounter people of lessor standing that I trust implicitly, and those of higher standing that I would not trust out of my eyesight.

So I just found out they dont teach cursive in school anymore.

Can some parent please explain the logic here.

As far as I know you need a cursive signature for checks and legal documents.

I dont understand this.

http://www.justanswer.com/law/0sn5r-law-signature-cursive.html


That depends on the state, but in general, no.

Basically the signature needs to be hard to duplicate. That doesn't mean it has to be cursive. At least that's what I got from that article.

And as a parent, quite honestly I don't care if my daughters learn cursive or not. Especially since we live in a day in age where you don't even need to physically sign a paper to open something like a bank account or loan, anymore. All digital.

Hell, have you seen a doctors signsture? That ain't cursive. I dunno what it is but it definitely isn't cursive.

IMO, it was a nice style of writing that has just gone it's lifecycle.

Right now going through the underwriting process and such, it's all digital signing. The mortgage team Is based in Kansas City, so I never even physically met my loan officer.

I get that. Signatures arent printed though. Even digital signatures arent printed.

I guess banks and such will have to start accepting printed signatures.

Cursive remains the only way my writing remains eligible.

So they don't teach math, writing, manners, or respect any more in schools. They do teach kids how to whine, cry, and act like idiots.

My oldest son is in second grade and was taught cursive in school this year.

Why are kids are growing up to be snowflakes you ask...

Because their liberal parents are already there!

The only issue with that logic is that many of the snowflakes are coming from conservative families, especially the more financially well off ones.

Yea right, more Liberal Facts huh.

8 year olds are (censored) idiots. I bet they haven't even read Infinite Jest yet.

j/c

The kids I know might be 'snowflakes' in other areas of their lives, but they simply aren't allowed to be that way in my private studio.

A note is either in-tune or it's out of tune. A note either occurs on-time or it's off. Loud/soft. Fast/slow. These are arithmetic values that give music it's structure, and if the math don't add up, I don't want to hear excuses about why it's OK to be inaccurate.

I'm ruthlessly candid in lessons, because they cannot progress if they aren't taught how to hear the imperfections in their playing. I've actually fired kids from my studio for not giving max effort.

I don't give out achievement stickers.
I don't praise mediocre performances.
I don't cheerlead or blow sunshine up their noses.
I tell them on their first day: "If you cannot handle corrective criticism, the serious study of high-level music-making is not for you... and I am definitely not the teacher you want. If you want to be a hobbyist, tell me now. You'll get one more session with me next week, when I will have a list of teachers who don't mind babysitting with cellos in the room."

My kids are mentally tough because music is not for wusses. They take an emotional pounding (not abuse) once every 7 days... and keep coming back for more. They don't cry, they don't whine. They don't expect constant praise, and they've learned to take my observations in stride.

Their time working with me teaches them:

discipline
working toward long-term goals
fighting through disappointment/temp set-backs
taking instruction
critical thought processes
recognizing imperfection
planning corrective attack strategies
constant (honest) self-evaluation

and so much more.

___________________

I get the subject matter of this thread, but I also consider it to be no different than the talk I used to hear from the graybeards down at the barber shop when I was still a teen. To general. To prone to confirmation bias. Not 'person-specific' enough. I know that kids exist like the ones being described herein, but my 35 years of one-on-one time with these young'uns draws a very different picture.

My kids take a licking- and keep on ticking.

This is how it's done. Whatever my kids get/got involved in, I always treated it like if they wanted it, I was gonna expect the best effort they had in whatever that activity was.

If they didn't want to give it, they moved on to something else.

I agree.

I have the answer. Boy's aren't allowed to be boys anymore. If at a yong age a male displays male traits, he is put on mind and mood altering drugs.

quote above by 'peen:

"If at a young age a male displays male traits, he is put on mind and mood altering drugs."

This is like a scary revelation.

No kiddin'. Thank God I grew-up in the 60s.

They would have had me on drugs A-to-Z. And I'd have turned into a self-doubting, insecure, ineffective man.

Does my ass look big in these gym shorts?

yes

Thanks MrTed,

Think I'll do a few extra crunches this morning after I stretch.

OK, you caught me.

Does this room make me look fat?