What's 8 inches long, has a bald head on it, and gives women pleasure?
A hundred dollar bill.
Mum.... A hundred liar bill is only 6 inches long. (OK 6.14)
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
Miracle Teenager Survives On His Own For Almost 6 Hours With No Wi-Fi
IN what has been hailed as ‘a miracle’, one Waterford teenager has reportedly survived in his home with no connection to the internet for almost 6 whole hours.
Answering to the name ‘David Gowan’, the 16-year-old was found in a distressed state yesterday evening, walking through a Dungarvan neighbourhood holding his Samsung Galaxy above his head looking for a signal and muttering incoherently.
The emergency services were notified and David was brought to a nearby Starbucks and hooked up to their Wi-Fi immediately. It remains unclear as to how the teen was left without internet for such a long period of time, and a search has begun to find David’s parents, with fears that they may have other kids without even a single bar of coverage.
“David survived without access to any social media or video sharing sites for the better part of an afternoon,” said an amazed member of Waterford’s child protection services.
“No GIFs, no memes, no porn. It’s incredible to see him in such good condition, considering what he went through. There’s grown adults who can’t go without internet for that long, let alone teenagers. God love him like, he didn’t even see the new Star Wars trailer yet”.
David was not available for interview, with rumours circulating that the poor youngster had lost the ability to speak in anything other than normal English, having not used emojis for so long.
My dog chased a possum up the grape arbor last night at about 2am.
He tried his best to climb up after him. I can't believe how he's able to do things he hasn't been able to do for years. I went out and brought my dog in, (because he was barking like a nut) and there the possum is ..... on top of the grape vines, playing dead.
It's not a joke, but it was rather goofy.
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
This was pretty goofy. I didn't know the Babe could act!
When I went to Chicago, for a training class in Lombard, I swear I almost died 5 or 6 times before I got to my hotel. The driver was zipping between cars so quickly that I seriously believe I was only an inch from other cars at times. I have never been that scared, and I have had a gun pulled on me.
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
Dispatch alerts Adam-12 that a '2-11' is in progress... but doesn't say where the crime is being committed. D00dz do a U-turn and speed off- with no destination. I guess "handle code 3" means to just drive somewhere and do some stuff.
![[Linked Image from i28.photobucket.com]](http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c201/shadedog/mcenroe2.jpg)
