DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Everything Else... Son Of Goofy

I always suspected that Gilmour was a domineering bully...

*insert photo of my son*

She looks a lot like the old man.

I like how he "throttled down" at the end of the block.....

Pavlov's Dawgs.

Funny as hell.

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named “Ahmal.” The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him “Juan.” Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, They’re twins! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal.”

A little old lady was walking down the street, dragging two large trash bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped, and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there is money falling out of your bag."
"Oh really?" said the lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for letting me know."

"Well not so fast," says the cop. "Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it did you?"

"Oh of course not," says the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a golf course. A lot of golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. It kills the flowers, you know. But then I thought, why not make the best of it.

So now I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, "OK, buddy! Give me $20 or off it comes!"

"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "Well good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays."

Phil Simms on Ryan Fitzpatrick: "He's a dual threat man- he has the ability to make both teams win..."

That was great.

Just when we thought 2020 couldn’t get any worse, Mexico City residents got the living daylights scared out of them when what appeared to be a giant rat was pulled up out of the city’s drainage system.

A realistic Halloween prop was among the 22 tons of trash and debris retrieved by crew workers from the sewage system, according to Border Report.

People marveled at how much it resembled a real rodent. Some told the outlet that if it had been seen on the street they would’ve run away in fear.

Local resident Evelin López laid claim to the monstrous monstrosity – saying her creation washed away years ago during storms in the city, and no one helped her find it.

No idea what she plans to do with the creepy creature.

The difference between millenials and boomers:

Taylor Swift: Writes whiny songs about her exes.

Stevie Nicks: Made her ex play guitar while she sung songs about what an
arsehole he was.

I actually posted that meme on FB. lol

I was going to put the meme here but thought it might get yanked. It was too funny not to share.

I was just looking at the comments about the OL PFF grades after game S20/G3 in another forum. Bitonio, Tretter, especially Teller, and Conkin are all grading well to very well. The only one not excelling is Wills, actively converting from RT (all his life) to LT...in NFL games.

Trying to play FB left-handed (figuratively speaking) after having done it right-handed his whole life must be difficult.

It called to mind one of my favorite all time songs, Bill Withers' I Can't Write Left-Handed

edited to add {I guess the twist of thought being goofy is why I chose to post this here}

During TC (or earlier), Wills likened it to "learning how to wipe your butt with the other hand-"

The old lady handed her bank card to a bank teller and said, “I would like to withdraw $10".

The teller told her, “For withdrawals less than $100 please use the ATM.”
The old lady wanted to know why ...

The teller returned her bank card and irritably told her, “These are the rules. Please leave if there is no other matter. There is a line of customers behind you.”

The old lady remained silent for a few seconds, then handed the card back to the teller and said, “Please help me withdraw all the money I have.”

The teller was astonished when she checked the account balance. She nodded her head, leaned down and respectfully told her, you have $300,000 in your account and the bank doesn't have that much cash currently. Could you make an appointment and come again tomorrow?

The old lady then asked how much she could withdraw immediately.
The teller told her any amount up to $3000

"Well, please let me have $3000 now", she said. The teller then handed it very friendly and respectfully to her.

The old lady put $10 in her purse and asked the teller to deposit $2990 back into her account.

The moral of this tale .......

Don't be difficult with old people, they spent a lifetime learning the skills.

In line at the bank the other day, Some old lady was trying to conduct a hostile takeover via the ATM,

When pressed about it, in senility she thought she was talking to a human teller.

(the first line needs credited to some comedian from 25 years ago, May-be Paula Poundstone.)

j/c

Son of Goofy?

I hear tell that blocking and tackling, ^^ is all about really wanting to do it.

Repeat, but still makes me laugh...

that is so freakkin great!


"-a joke which I'm just now getting..."

.

Ugh.

j/c

some will get it- others won't.
nerdliness-on HGH.

pm it.
or I'll ruin your reputation.

Wrong place.