DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Tailgate Forum Need somebody to calm me down about my house/life

So, I found mold in my main area bathroom. -Had to rip down the walls surrounding my shower, and the walls on the other side of the studs. -So I have to put new backerboard up in my bathroom, tile over it (or finish it somehow) caulk it, make sure everything seals up okay. Then I have to put back the drywall on the other side of the studs, finish that, paint over it and hope it matches up to the other three walls in that room, I have ufinished drywall going up my stairs. I have a bedroom that needs to be painted. I have floors that need to be refinished, a kitchen that needs to be completely redone, a basement that needs to have a new floor put down (either floating, or carpeting) basement walls that need to be painted. I have weeds that keep coming back in my front lawn, a backyard that has more weeds than I can keep up with. My wife is 4.5 months pregnant, and I work 60-70 hours a week. Somebody out there, please, give me advice on how to approach this thing, and what I need to fix first, and what the most efficient way is.

Did you find mold in the walls when you tore everything down?

There was some mold on the studs, but that has all been killed. I also inspected the floor beneath my bathtub. I had a plumber buddy of mine give me some industrial strength mold killer. The bathroom has not been used in 3 weeks. All signs, and scents of any mold/water damage are gone. Why do you ask?

LOL I do that anyway.

Buckel up my friend, there is a lot of work to be done, or a lot of money to be spent.

Good luck to you! This is why we only buy new builds.

Buy a good weed killer ....

Prioritize ........

Take things one at a time ......


Everyone wants to get everything done "today" ...... but it just isn't possible if you are doing the work yourself, and also working a heavy duty work schedule.

The bathroom needs to be first ...... along with upkeep on the outside ........ then move onto the next most pressing project.

Winter is a really good time to tackle inside projects. (especially days when it doesn't snow)

Make sure the bathroom is done first, and done right. Mold can grow in the weirdest places. The good news is most mold is not harmful to humans. Yeah, you read that right - most mold is not harmful to people. It IS harmful to building materials though, so get it taking care of.

Your yard? Spray. Depending on the size of your yard, you might want to spend a couple hundred bucks and get a pull behind sprayer. If you have a small yard, a hand held pump sprayer will work. If it's really nasty, find a product called "trimec". It'll knock the weeds down no problem. Then, follow up as needed with Ortho Weed B Gone. It works.

The rest of the rooms - hey, paint is cheap.

The kitchen? You wanna do a whole new kitchen? Cupboards and all? It can be done on a budget. I did ours 8 years ago. PM me if you want to see pictures. I was in that line of work for a while. (re modeling kitchens, designing kitchens in new homes - I've installed, etc) Hey, I made a living at it.

Just remember - 1 thing at a time.

sounds like poor time management, how about less time on here and more time there?

Wish I could help. I've been fighting some depression lately and have been trying to keep myself busy. Living alone, I can't find enough to keep me busy.

It will all get done in time. My dad was in a similar situation with my parents house. It took years, but slowly he got the projects done that needed to be done.

Aside from the bathroom - the mold thing - what muni is looking at is nothing. And muni, I'm not trying to belittle you or your situation..........but really, get the bathroorm taken care of first.

Then, bam, a couple of evenings and a few gallons of paint - rooms are taken care of. Move to the yard. Bam - zap it with trimec - game over. The kitchen might take some planning.....but heck, I'll give him a plan if he gives me the details on the size of the kitchen. Free. All he'll have to do is decide what kind of cupboards he wants......and I can give advice there as well.

1 thing at a time - and painting and spraying the yard.......heck, paint a room, go out and spray the yard. Come back in, the paint will be dry.

I know what it is to feel overwhelmed. You have to start, and then work your way through things one at a time.

Ya only get one go around, those are things, things that will get done,

first make sure you spend time with your wife & enjoy getting ready for your child, those are the things that are importnat,

1. Get rid of the mold, Call your family, Friends up and aks if they can lend a hand, for a afternoon or day, buy the stuff you need have two people paint, two people outside back yard and 2-3 fixing the bathroom, if that dosent work, just get to it when ya can. It will be there, lifes stressfull enough with work family bill and ever raising prices on everything, these things you control, so control them but enjoy life.

Unless there is a deadline dictating your priority, the method I have used my whole life at home, school, and work is to knock off one project at time, starting with the easiest to finish, leaving the most daunting last.

To me, if you start on the hardest first, in the back of your mind you are still concerned about all the other crap you still have to finish. With those out of the way, the project or task that will require the most effort can be your total focus, allowing you to do A+ work rather than rushing and making mistakes or cutting corners.

Sit down with your wife and make a list of the projects. Then between the 2 of you put them in a priority order, most likely the bathroom being first.

Then plan to make time to work on a project, then if it took a lot out of you, take a week or 2 off and do something fun, then start the next one, and so on.

Also, be sure you do them right, don't take shortcuts, because you'll just end up having to do another repair later.

And on the bathroom, be sure to use cement board backer rather than greenboard drywall, you'll have a lot fewer issues in the future.

No matter what, just remember...You plan on being here for a while, so you have time to do the projects, but don't let them stress you or get in the way of your relationship with your wife and child.

If your wife is due in 4 months you need to protect her and the l'il one first.

Evaluate your projects and consider potential health risks above all. I would think that mold elimination in the bathroom would be of greatest importance.

You can live without a couple coats of paint on another room...unless the wife is nagging you and believe me I know how important it is to keep a growing,hot pregnant woman calm.

I'd suggest you find some kid to cut your grass...and soon. You'll be amazed at how much better you feel about the home if the exterior is neat and cut...you will want to get home faster to tackle other tasks.

Not trying to trivialize your situation... just trying to show your now alone. As it helped me right now reading your post... My list...

1. Two kids in diapers (2 and 5 months)
2. Unfinished painting in 5 month olds room, hallway, basement, and living room
3. Finish tile border in recently remodeled bathroom
4. Finsih wall I ripped down to open up kitchen and entrance to basement
5. Finish basement - drywall walls, run cable and phone, put up doors, drop ceiling... so far I've studded everything and ran electric
6. Put in new windows (nat gas prices went up 30% and I need new windows bad before winter)
7. Maybe get some more insulation in the attic due to what I mention above
8. Shingle and winter guard that back patio (10' x 20') roof before winter... rolled roofing won't last another Erie winter
9. Remodel kitchen.. this is last on my list because at least the kitchen if functional right now.. just old

A list I have completed since buying the home three years ago... one day at a time.

1. took out old brick flower bed upfront and put new flower bed in... planted trees... resurfaced and painted steps
2. remodeled bathroom that had a toilet ready to fall through the floor the next time I sat on it due to a nast leak in toilet
3. copper plummed my whole house
4. new hot water tank
5. central air
6. chain link fence in back yard
7. carpet in living room
8. painted every room in the house pretty much
9. rewired my whole house
10. ran gas out to patio for grill
11. pergo flooring in dining room
12. Closed in with drywall what use to be the old office to make it a bedroom for my 5 month old.
13. privacy fence out by patio so I don't have to look at the neighbors.
14. restained deck

Might have forgot a few... but just goes to show... if you keep chipping away things will get done little by little. My best advice to you though would be to finish a project before moving on to another one. I have like 2-3 projects that I just kinda got bored with and didn't paint that last piece of trim, or put it in, etc. And haven't touched it since. I'm a bad project finisher... I love starting them though. A wise man once told me your house will be an ongoing project until either, A you die, or B you move. So just get use to the idea and put your working boots on for an hour or two when you get home from your other job.

I haven't had it quite as bad as you, but I was stressing about 3 months ago with the mounting work and costs of things that had to be done to the house and for my health.

I made a spreadsheet of everything.

I divided it into "Urgent", "had to have soon" and "like to haves."
I then divided those into what can be done quickly and costs.
Started with the urgents and then planned the "had to have soons" around time and costs.

Rome wasn't built in a day. Keep a calendar (I use Yahoo's online calendar) to make a schedule and try to stick to it.

The hardest part of everything is working around the work hours. You can do it!!

Sometimes you find mold and when you dig into the walls and floors, you see nothing else.. that's a good thing..

Other times, you open up a wall and it's covered in mold and obviously, that's not a good thing.

There was a condo over here in Aurora, about 10 years or so ago. It was probably 18 or so years old at that time.

There was a health problem that one of the residents was experiencing.. breathing problems and other associated illnesses. My understanding is that her doctor recommended that her home be inspected..

Yikes,, what they found would scare you. BLACK Mold everywhere, IN all the walls, floors, subfloors, in the ceilings and every room in the house.

They literally had to gutt the place,, new walls, new studding, insulations, flooring, drywall and then all new fixtures..

It was a very very costly process and caused many lawsuits that I think, after all this time, are still going on.. it's a mess.

It seems that you don't have that situation.. so, in that regard, you should feel lucky.. It could be a helluva lot worse.

Do you feel calmer now?

best of luck.

Thanks to everybody. I feel better. My wife and I will sit down tonight and iron out a plan.

Just remember that even though your wife is preggers, there is no reason for her not to at least help a bit. Obviously, no paint (fumes), but handing you tools, helping clean things up etc. can be a HUGE help! I had my hubby, my mom and my sister over to help us get the house ready. They did all the heavy lifting, the painting etc. I made sure they were fed, had enough to drink and I helped direct where things should go, what things should be thrown out and so on. Basically, I was like a project manager and they were there to be my hands.

Hell, for exercise, I would swing a hammer around and lift some boxes (though not too heavy). It was a nice workout and a good way for me to help out. And I was 7 months along when we were doing this.

In other words, get the wife involved a bit. I look at the upstairs of my house now and I see the little things that I did and I'm proud of them. And, I was the one that got to decorate it all and people are always saying how great everything looks, decor-wise. So

Prioritize, prioritize, prioritze!!!! Do the most urgent things first...the bathroom etc. You and I seem to have a similar list of to-do's, I just happen to be a few months ahead of you (since my baby is 5.5 months old now). My next task will be done this winter, stripping wallpaper and then painting the walls (I can't STAND wallpaper!!!!!). That will change the look of my kitchen without costing alot of money. Then we're changing the hardware on our cabinets (can't stand bright, shiny, cheap brass), then we'll do the most expensive thing...the floors (who puts wall-to-wall CARPET in their kitchen?????). Well, and the other expensive thing...replace the stove and fridge (the dishwasher's already new). But I've got an in for discounts on Whirlpool/KitchenAid/Maytag/Amana appliances... Next spring (after I get my bonus from work), we'll tackle the outside of the house.

Im the exact opposite, Id rather dive into the hardest areas first, and have an easy finish. But either way, I would want my bathroom first personally. Kitchen and Bath are goin to be where you and especially your wife spend most of your time. And where youll get the most enjoyment out of it being done.

Wow Muni, that sucks.

all I can say is that once you get stuff uncovered it's probably worse than you think, it's going to cost a fortune and it's going to take forever to get it all fixed, your house is going to be torn up for a long time...

Hope that calms you down.

Man, sounds like you have a lot of work to do.

I feel the same way sometimes, but it's more of keeping things up than fixing up. I've pretty much done up every room in my house except the one I'm sitting in now, then den (actually a bedroom). The only that needs work is the landscaping. Grass just overgrows into my rocks/shrubs, and just comes back continuously. My problems are nothing compared to yours.

Question- did you purchase this house like this? Sounds like a mess if you did. Guess I shouldn't jump to conclusions. Like others have said- one thing at a time.

And I agree with Peen. Take on one task at a time, and always do the quickest and easiest jobs first. This way, it seems like you're accomplishing more. If you have the money, sometimes it's better to just pony up and have someone help out. I did some stuff on my own, but I paid for a lot of the work done. They're professionals and probably would do a better job anyways.

Like when I installed my new counter top, sink and faucet. My measurement on the counter was just a hair off, but luckily it was where it met the stove, so you don't notice it. Then my plumbing work sucked, and my sink leaked until one day it clogged, my grandfather messed with it, and it all came apart on my kitchen floor....

Point is, sometimes you can't do it all alone, unless you have a lot of time (which you're saying you don't), or aren't in a rush to get them done. Just take one thing at a time, and if you have some money, have people do a few things to help out.

"MOVE THAT BUS"