|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349
Hall of Famer
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349 |
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
It would have to do with the fact it was my name...just like guys get to keep theirs. 
But its not YOUR name.
My name isn't mine??  It has been for almost 37 years....and it will be the day I die.
I mean once you get married it is no longer about YOU. Its about US. Damn that didnt really come out right  . Well for you it would be different I guess . Oh damn you homosexuals keep confusing me  Wait that didnt come out right either. 
You may be in the drivers seat but God is holding the map. #GMSTRONG
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955 |
Quote:
I thin it shows a commitment between a man and a woman and it is a symbol of your shared life.
As it would be for the guy in the original article to take his wife's last name, no?
Quote:
So what about kids? Whos name are they supposed to take.
Whichever one the couple decides on. I had a different last name than my mother for most of my life...still do...because she was remarried. Didn't matter much at all.
Quote:
As far as it being easier. I didnt realize that a marriage is about convenience.
For some women, it only makes sense to keep the same last name when dealing with their jobs. That's what I meant. Also makes it easier if the marriage doesn't work out. My Mother has her ex husbands name 20 years later. ICK. 
#gmstrong #gmlapdance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955 |
Quote:
I mean once you get married it is no longer about YOU. Its about US. Damn that didnt really come out right . Well for you it would be different I guess . Oh damn you homosexuals keep confusing me Wait that didnt come out right either.
Talk about confused!  
#gmstrong #gmlapdance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 11,367
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 11,367 |
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
It would have to do with the fact it was my name...just like guys get to keep theirs.
But its not YOUR name.
My name isn't mine?? It has been for almost 37 years....and it will be the day I die.
I mean once you get married it is no longer about YOU. Its about US. Damn that didnt really come out right . Well for you it would be different I guess . Oh damn you homosexuals keep confusing me Wait that didnt come out right either.
Phew. Talk about making people dizzy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349 |
Quote:
Also makes it easier if the marriage doesn't work out. My Mother has her ex husbands name 20 years later. ICK.
I think that is the part that bothers me a bit in the commitment dept. I think when you go into a marrige you go in with the mindstate that it is forever. I feel like going into a marrige doing things " in case it doesnt work" is a recipe for disaster. Not saying there arent reasons to get out of a marriage but I dont think you should go into the marriage looking for those things.
KING
You may be in the drivers seat but God is holding the map. #GMSTRONG
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,732
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,732 |
I tend to agree with that, king'o but others like to have their ducks in a row. Just in case things sour.
![[Linked Image from i28.photobucket.com]](http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c201/shadedog/mcenroe2.jpg) gmstrong -----------------
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886 |
Talk about much to do about nothing! All Buday had to do is change his name legally to her last name before the marriage, done deal. Even now, just endure the line and go through court proceedings. Think about it, most jobs barely make you fill out any paperwork to change things around. The only time it gets hectic is at the DMV and passport paperwork!! Just a waste of court time!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955 |
Quote:
Quote:
Also makes it easier if the marriage doesn't work out. My Mother has her ex husbands name 20 years later. ICK.
I think that is the part that bothers me a bit in the commitment dept. I think when you go into a marrige you go in with the mindstate that it is forever. I feel like going into a marrige doing things " in case it doesnt work" is a recipe for disaster. Not saying there arent reasons to get out of a marriage but I dont think you should go into the marriage looking for those things.
KING
I wasn't saying you should go in with the "just in case" in mind.
#gmstrong #gmlapdance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349 |
Quote:
Talk about much to do about nothing! All Buday had to do is change his name legally to her last name before the marriage, done deal. Even now, just endure the line and go through court proceedings.
I think you are missing the whole point of the article. It is a legal process to change your name. A woman who changes her name when she is married doesnt have to go through this legal process all he has to do is show a marriage certificate. Not the same for a man.
KING
You may be in the drivers seat but God is holding the map. #GMSTRONG
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886 |
That is true but the article also states how the mayor of L.A changed his last name via the court system to use part his last name and his wifes last name. just because women can just show a marriage cert for legality is no big deal. Since he wants the new last name, just get in line and deal with it.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955 |
I think you're still missing the point....when a woman takes a man's last name by marriage there are no name changing fees. This man will have to pay a boatload of money to take her last name by marriage. It's not fair to him.
We can all change our names if we want to pay the $3k or whatever it is...but he shouldn't have to is the point.
#gmstrong #gmlapdance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886 |
Dawgmichelle, Quote:
when a woman takes a man's last name by marriage there are no name changing fees. This man will have to pay a boatload of money to take her last name by marriage. It's not fair to him.
I understand but what I'm saying is that since he is changing his name, pay up. Reason being is that Society/religion..etc has been set up for the woman to change her name upon marriage and basically society has said, this type of name change - no fee. Now guess what.. if a woman wants to hyphenate her name later, legally, she gotta pay!
Now has far as he is concerned, at any time he wants to change/add..etc to his name legally, he has to pay. Like I said before, if it was such an issue for her, all he had to do is change his name before they got married.. done deal!
BTW - once he goes to court, stands in line and pays the court fee, he still has to go to DMV - stand in line, pay the fee, send paperwork off to SSN to get that changed, any passport or legal docs have to be changed, FOR A FEE, so like I said, just pay the money and pipe down!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955 |
Nevermind....you still don't get it.
#gmstrong #gmlapdance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886 |
All I'm saying is that if he does win this, he will still be in line and paying fees for the different services anyway!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 5,657
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 5,657 |
No he won't. He'll fill out some paperwork and those places will change his name for FREE, just like they do for women when they get married. That is the whole point of why he is going to court. He's looking for a CHANGE in the system.
Why should a man that wants to take his wife's last name have to pay all those fees, when at the same time his wife would not have to pay those fees?
My husband and I discussed what last name we would go with when we got married. I am the last of the line for my Dad's family (we're all girls at my generation), but my husband is the last chance for his family name to carry on. Neither of us wants either family name to die out.
The husband taking the wife's last name isn't as uncommon as people may think. Families with titles (Duke, Count, Lord, etc) where there is only a female descendant left will have the man she marries take HER family name. It preserves the title and keeps in in the same family name.
Why should the man be penalized for doing something that aides the wife's family? He shouldn't. He should have the same opportunity to change his name as newlywed as a woman does.
ONLY as a newlywed though...if he changes his mind later, screw him. If I wanted to back to my maiden name now and stay married to my hubby, I'd have to go through the whole legal riggamarole.
RIP My Love
1969-2025
20 years was not enough
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399 |
Quote:
Only because it's what's been done forever. I would have kept my name...and it would have nothing to do with commitment. It would have to do with the fact it was my name...just like guys get to keep theirs.
Hypothetically then, whose name would the children get?
yebat' Putin
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955 |
As I said above....whichever name the couple decides they get. Or they could use both. Use one as a middle name. Doesn't really matter.
#gmstrong #gmlapdance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399 |
Maybe it's just the old-fashioned in me, maybe it's that I like to keep things simple... but I don't get it..... I like to say, "The Williams Family".... Not Mr. Williams, Ms. Smith and all of the little Williams-Smiths.....
yebat' Putin
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,955 |
I understand that. And, none of this is an issue if one of the partners wants the others last name. Regardless, it doesn't change a family dynamic to have different last names. I was five when my Mother got remarried and we never had trouble having different last names and it didn't change the meaning of our family.
#gmstrong #gmlapdance
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 473
All Pro
|
|
All Pro
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 473 |
I kept my last name... I just hyphenated it with his I'm one of those really obnoxious people with 2 last names
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399 |
No, this name game should have absolutely zero effect on the love and relationship within the family, it just seems like an outside distraction... LOL... what happens when Jason Williams-Smith marries Laura Atkins-Daniels and both are adament about keeping their name? Is their son Justin Atkins-Daniels-Williams-Smith?  It could get out of control.....
yebat' Putin
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,483
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,483 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 30,942
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 30,942 |
j/c
I think this whole thing is lame. He wants to change his name? He can. He could have before the wedding, he can after the wedding, he can now, or in 20 years.
His whole beef is "it's going to cost me more money". Tough, you make a decision, live with it - don't try to change the system just to suit you.
And as for hyphenated last names, gimme a break. Who's the genius that thought this thing up? While it sounds all nice and lovey dovey and so modern and 50/50 and what not - did the people that do this ever think of kids?
Joe Smith marries Sally Jones. They are now considered Joe and Sally Jones Smith (or Smith Jones). They have a son, Jonny Jones Smith.
Another couple, Sally Whipperwill and Ed Flausenhopper, get married. They "choose" to become Sally and Ed Whipperwill-Flausenhopper (just to show their lovey dovey, 50/50 commitment)
They have a kid, Jane Whipperwill - Flausenhopper.
Jonny and Jane get married. Now what? Neither one of them wants to give up their names, so they combine them.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I introduce to you Mr. and Mrs. Jonny and Jane Jones-Smith-Whipperwill-Flausenhopper.
Take it another generation.......It's ridiculous.
Hell, postage would go up just cause of that - envelope sizes would have to increase, credit cards would be elongated, the name tags you see today would end up stretching across a persons chest, and soon wrap around to the back.
S.S. would go ballistic trying to keep names straight, thus leading to more people going "postal", (which raised their rates), bank loans would need an additional page or 2 (like they're not long enough no), phone books would have to be re-configured, thus causing us to use more paper, leading to more deforestation, leading to more global warming, leading to higher taxes to combat global warming......it never ends, all cause some dillweed wants to sue to have his way, and cheap....
I know their are some elements in society that need changing, but ladies and gentlemen, this one is so far down on the list that it is laughable.....and for the aclu to even step in tells me just one more thing about them......
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 30,942
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 30,942 |
Quote:
No, this name game should have absolutely zero effect on the love and relationship within the family, it just seems like an outside distraction...
LOL... what happens when Jason Williams-Smith marries Laura Atkins-Daniels and both are adament about keeping their name? Is their son Justin Atkins-Daniels-Williams-Smith? It could get out of control.....
Ah, you beat me to it - I was typing while you were posting.....
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399 |
Yea but you win for creativity with the Whipperwills and Flausenhoppens...
yebat' Putin
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,886 |
BrownsBabe, Quote:
He'll fill out some paperwork and those places will change his name for FREE, just like they do for women when they get married.
Since I got married two years ago, some of those places you gotta pay!! Now where you live, not sure how they handle it but go to the DMV to change your name = pay, passport = pay ( I know the passport on first hand!!). As far as other types of paperwork,(legal stuff) either you will have to get it notorized and for somethings you will be paying!
Also, remember, there is a WHOLE system of things that changing his name to her name effects.(govt paperwork..etc) So like I said, he will be sitting in lines anyway and paying! BTW - I'm not opposed to him changing his name, but YUP, he gotta go through the process!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 15,015
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 15,015 |
Quote:
Quote:
It would have to do with the fact it was my name...just like guys get to keep theirs.
But its not YOUR name. Part of a marriage is two becoming one.
KING
So then they should unanimously vote on a NEW last name for both then.
We don't have to agree with each other, to respect each others opinion.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 28,404
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 28,404 |
kind of a mesh of the previous names... like ChristmaKwanzaChannukah
Browns is the Browns
... there goes Joe Thomas, the best there ever was in this game.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,349 |
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
It would have to do with the fact it was my name...just like guys get to keep theirs.
But its not YOUR name. Part of a marriage is two becoming one.
KING
Well I guess just call me old fashion. I would have felt (and my wife agreed) disrespected as a man if my wife didnt want to take my last name. JMO and everyone is entitled to their own.
KING
So then they should unanimously vote on a NEW last name for both then.
You may be in the drivers seat but God is holding the map. #GMSTRONG
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 750
All Pro
|
|
All Pro
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 750 |
Quote:
Quote:
If men want to tell the world they don't have a set, they should be able to.
Yeah, because that makes a REAL man. LOL!!! Oye.
To me this says irresposibility is ok, because to me this tradition is about accepting responsibility. REAL men don't shirk resposibility. This man may be the most responsible person in the world, and he probably is. However he is symbolically telling the world otherwise. Based of course, on a centuries old tradition.
Go Irish!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,470
Dawg Talker
|
|
Dawg Talker
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,470 |
Quote:
Quote:
And, that's cool. She can take yours, she can keep hers, but you can't take hers. Makes no sense.
You can take hers but so few have done it that they probably never really needed to simplify it. The process they have now is just for people wanting to legally change their name not specifically for newly married men to take their bosses....errrrrrrr... I mean new wifes name.
I would have felt kind of funny if my wife had told me she doesnt want to take my name. It would kind of make me feel like she isnt ready to commit to the marriage.
KING
So you would have felt she wasn't ready for commitment if she didn't want to take your name but it doesn't mean a thing that you feel funny about taking her name. You guys kill me. Oh and btw there are many societies where linage is traced through the woman's name. It really does make more sense ytou know a woman always knows a child is hers. 
![[Linked Image from i98.photobucket.com]](http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l272/iambrown92/lama.gif) Peace, Love and Football
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,483
Hall of Famer
|
|
Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,483 |
Actually, BrownsBabe did make a very good point, this is not a set in stone proceedure that has been around since before the time of man/woman. This, just like the diamond engagement ring is an AMERICAN thing. Historically speaking, the folks in Europe if had only girls and married off to a family with more than one male child would be able to keep their family name going by one or more of their daughters future spouse taking her family name to continue the family name and line. This guy is actually doing the perfectly responsible thing of keeping her family name from dying out. Really think about it, how many of you have children and there are NO male children, wouldn't you like to see your name carried on? Or don't you have enough pride in your family name to embrace this wonderful sacrifice this young man is making in an effort to make it somewhat easier for men to take their future wife's name to continue the family name for her. (jmo on the sacrifice thingy)
Last edited by atomic_dog; 01/18/07 11:57 AM.
![[Linked Image from i8.photobucket.com]](http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a43/jlq112atomicdog/janstags/browns%20tags/atomic.jpg)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,470
Dawg Talker
|
|
Dawg Talker
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,470 |
Anyone ever hear of John Ono Lennon?
Peace, Love and Football
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399
Legend
|
|
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 40,399 |
Good, just another reason to not do it... who wants to be like Europe?
yebat' Putin
|
|
|
DawgTalkers.net
Forums DawgTalk Tailgate Forum Would You Take Your Wifes Name
When Married?
|
|
![[Linked Image from i6.photobucket.com]](http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y204/rottenspice/witness.jpg)
