DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Tailgate Forum Should I be a good neighbor in this situation?

In my computer room here I have some bushes outside of my window between my house and the neighbors garage. Well not neighbors exactly, no one lives there. I have the window a few inches open and I hear all this rustling around in the bushes. I'm thinking a dog is in there.

I open up the window, stick my head out and there is my neighbor from two houses down cutting into and pulling brush out. I ask if she lost a ball or something (she has kids) she says she does this every year. She wants to make it look like somebody lives in the empty house. We bought this house last year. She asks if the bushes are on my property. I say I'm sure they are but the bushes are staying until I fence in my backyard. I like the bushes there because it would keep people from wondering between my house and the empty one.

They do need a bit of trimming up. A bit, it's not they are six feet overgrown. She says she can see them from her side window. So as of right now she's still out there cutting and raking away. She's not taking them out but shaping them up. She's a nice lady from the little bit I talk to her but I am getting more pissed that she is over on my property without asking first cutting stuff away. She thinks they are on the empty houses property.

Should I just keep quiet and let her shape them up or say something in a nice way and tell her to get off my property. Even if they are a tad bit out of shape it's in a area that's kind of hidden but she can see them. I don't care if she likes them or not, they're mine and they can look how I want them to look. My house is taken care of. I'm not trashy or anything. She's still out there right now.

Speak your mind, I understand how this could bother you. But look at it this way...you're getting a free bush trimming.

Yo, jc:

Welcome to the joys of homeownership and "neighborhood politics."

My first step is to always try the diplomatic route. Since you admitted to us that the bushes could use a bit of trimming, offer to help her trim, or promise to trim when the time is right for you. (Sooner is better) Who knows? she may be relieved that she isn't the only one who cares about the way they look. At least by offering, you've defused a potentially hostile neighborhood situation.

Also, by getting out there, you get to trim them the way you want them to be... not HER way, which might not be to your liking. If she sees you trimming your own bushes, she's less likely to take matters into her own hands, which will leave you feeling less in control of your own property, and more frustrated with her.

Pushy neighbors can be a pain for sure, but there's the chance that she's really the nice lady you described. She's apparently working from habits developed over years past, and is just doing what she always does.

By at least talking to her, you can give the impression that you care about the neighborhood as much as she does, and it might keep her from giving your bushes an uninvited trim job in the future.

And if that doesn't work, a quick load of rock salt or birdshot in the ass will help make your point...

Rack a shell into the chamber of a 12 gauge with in ear shot of her. See how she responds.

Tough spot for you. First, assuming they are on your property and are yours - let her know as much. Second, as long as she's not hacking them to death, no problem - as of now.

Thirdly, bushes don't keep bad people out (unless they have prickers and thorns, etc) If they don't have thorns and prickers, overgrown bushes make great hiding places for people looking to break into a house.

Without knowing more, I can't tell you what I'd do.

Check that - IF they are yours, heck yes I'd tell her to get her butt out of my yard. BUT, I'd do it in a nice manner. No sense ticking off a neighbor over this. BUT, I would also get out there and trim them myself as well.

You don't want to tick her off, but you do need to establish your rights as far as she is concerned. At the same time, try to understand why she is doing it.

Find out what she likes to drink (and I say that in all seriousness - I had a neighbor lady once that, every night from my window, I could see her mixing vodka with.........you name it......some people drink tea, coffee, cola, milk, water.......whatever)

Maybe have everything available, ask her in, offer her a drink, or cookies........then in an adult manner get to what the root of the problem is - is she concerned about crooks, or is it a "I'm bored and want something to do " thing, or is it a mental thing........

Good luck.

As long as she does a nice job, it's free labor.

Oh, as to your thread title: "should I be a good neighbor in this situation"?

Always be a good neighbor. Respect your neighbors rights, and make sure they know you expect them to do the same. Don't cause a problem with a neighbor when there is a better alternative - even if it's more work.

Why? I'll make this as short as I can. 1/4 mile down the road - my neighbor has a shooting range. Had, I should say. Last summer, his neighbor and son got drunked up, and went out woodchuck hunting, and killed his cat. Neighbor got upset, called the cops. His wife made him get rid of the shooting range.

Other neighbors dog came into first neighbors yard..........he shot the dog. Cops were called again.

Normally, I'm all about an eye for an eye, so to speak. BUT, now, those 2 don't speak, the shooting range is gone, and none of them have pets. The live next door to each other. They don't speak, talk, etc........there's so much animosity it's pathetic. And they both own their houses and aren't moving. So? They'll deal with it for the next 15, 20, 30 years. And that's no fun for anyone. Plus, I lost my shooting range.

She's done now. She didn't trim them up alot. Just got the stray stuff out. She wants things to look nice and so do I. This house between ours the woman died awhile back, years and years ago. Her kids don't want to sell it. But there is no upkeep on it very often. Us neighbors cut the grass but the house itself looks raggedy.

I understand her trying to make it look like somebody lives there. Trying to keep it looking the best she can. I understand this. I live on the other side of this house, but to come over literally inches away from my window and start hacking away bothered me. I'll keep the bushes trimmed up more. They were barely overgrown. A few twigs sticking up here and there. Nothing crazy. But for her to say she can see them from her house, she must be really looking for them as her sightline would be very narrow to almost non existant.

Oh well, I won't say anything else to her, but I thought she should have at least knocked on my door and asked if it was ok. Not come on over and start cutting away.

Next time you see her out, just mention it in a nice way that you would prefer to trim your own bushes. Shouldn't be a big problem, and she will more than likely understand.

or... you could mention that you like your pit bull to do the trimming for you...

Phil is right. You got some free landscaping.

If you want to let her know that you will take care of your own, do the neighborly thing and stop by sometime soon and thank her. Then add that you will take care of it yourself.

I am fortunate that I have good neighbors all around. I too have a shrub just outside my computer room right next to my neighbors drive way. I planted a Rose of Sharon there about 3-4 years ago for a bit of privacy and a some shade. It's about 6 or 7 feet high now and has worked out well. I only prune it to shape and would have had a major problem with my neighbor taking the clippers to it.

You say no one has lived in the house for year's?
This should be #1 on everyone's list, an empty house is an invite to critter's of all sort's that can be very bad for you and her.

The next time she comes over put on a hockey mask, grab a chain saw and machete, and run out the door straight toward her.

If she bakes, adopt her.

Sounded like she thought they were on the vacant lot property.

Vacant houses pull down property value and attract criminals.

I myself wouldn't get to worried about it. Sounds like you have a neighbor who cares what things look like and has a watchful neighborhood eye. The positives in that far outweigh the negatives.

Quote:

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I don't care if she likes them or not, they're mine and they can look how I want them to look. My house is taken care of. I'm not trashy or anything. She's still out there right now.

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By this statement and the fact you ran a thread on it indicates that it bothered you. Speak to her nicely about it and it shouldn't be a big deal.

It's not a big deal, I just found it unusual. I'm here typing and she's in my yard hacking away. I guess it's a good thing to have a neighbor who cares about the appearance of the street and so do I. But I would have asked first instead of marching over here and start cutting away.

My first initial reaction was what the hell is she doing over here cutting on my bush.
Just kind of strange.

Well, she's done it before so she didn't see it as an issue..... *shrug*

The property next to Christy's house sat empty all of last year, and the owner asked me to take care of the yard work to make it appear as if someone was there. I did a great deal of work, as it had been neglected and he was taking care of me monetarily pretty well......now this year there is someone there and I find myself being internally critical at times with his yard.

Just take her out some lemonade and point out the bushes on the other side of the house to her!

You didn't tell us if the neighbor lady was good looking or not. How can we make an informed decision?

And just a question here....are they you bushes??

Is it possible they really are on the other property.....people tend to plat those just inside the line.

Again....not trying to irritate you, just asking the question.

You have the empty house driveway, then about four feet of grass which is where the bushes are then the side of my house. The bushes are up against the side of my house which I understand doesn't mean it's my property.

I called some surveyors (sp) to see where my land is because we want to fence in the backyard next year but they wanted around 500 bucks to do that. And I haven't looked for the stakes yet. This is unrelated to the bush trimming dilemma. It's not really a big deal. But she was inches away from my window. Kinda weird.

As far as the other posters asking questions.
She is a italian woman married to an indian. Probably in their 40's. Nice people for the little bit I know of them. He has invited me to golf with him in the past, she is nice but outgoing one day and acts like she doesn't know you the next.

It was just a strange thing to have happened. Imagine you think an animal is making noise in your bushes outside your window, stick your head out there and find the neighbor with tools cutting stuff down just inches away. Just kind of crazy.

Also, I want to add that I am not po'ed about this like I was yesterday. I now understand she is trying to make things look nice around that empty house. BUT, she said she has done this in the past. So the previous owners of my house knew about it and it must have been fine.

So if you were this lady, the previous owners moved out and new people moved in which would be us obviously, wouldn't you feel as this woman she should have knocked on our door and explained what she wanted to do before getting literally a foot away from my window and start cutting away.

I think it's crazy that she didn't do this. I wouldn't have the gonads to get inches away from somebodys window without telling them why I was there beforehand.

You're not irritating me at all Peen.
This is why I posted this here to get some other peoples thoughts.
Thanks for your input on this.

Can she come prune my yard next ? Or pull the weeds in my garden ?