DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Tailgate Forum Random Thoughts From the 27-33 Year Old Crowd...

I admit that usually when I get these in an email, I've eother seen them passed through 20 times before, but the majority of these are new, and funny. My personal favs are the Nintendo "trick" and hating cyclists.

Random thoughts from people our age...

-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell
my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves
me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.

-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to
have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and
sticks when they've invented the lighter?

-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're
going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to
be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the
direction from which you came, you have to first do something like
check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to
yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're
crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

-That's enough, Nickelback.

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was
younger.

-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know"
feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose
not to be friends with?

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't
work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically
fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards
or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

-There is a great need for sarcasm font.

-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the (heck) was going on when I first
saw it.

-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's
laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the
only one who really, really gets it.

-How the (heck) are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than
take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to
finish a text.

- A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the
spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

- Was learning cursive really necessary?

- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to
say".

- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying.

- My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads.
Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired
about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us."
Classy, bro.

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart",
all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up
to prevent a (jerk) from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in'
examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete
idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and
said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each
other?

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood.

- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died.

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water.

-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.

- I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu'
to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an
overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

- Bad decisions make good stories

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if
I do!

- Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring
would probably just be completely invisible.

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go
around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly
nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be
a problem....

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything
productive for the rest of the day.

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection.

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are
going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to.

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people
watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will
they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't
watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and
leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone
and run away?

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking.

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising
speed for pedophiles...

- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.

-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.

-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to
with it.

-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the
Donkey - but I’d bet my (rear) everyone can find and push the Snooze
button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time
every time...

-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would
happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the (heck) do I respond to that?

-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and
the link takes me to a video instead of text.

-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit.

-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw
they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words,
someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think
about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people
eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by
myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat ...
before dinner

too many of those remind me of myself.... not sure whether to chuckle or shy away a bit :>

That was good stuff, anyone know the origin?

Good stuff, beerdowner.

Pure gold.

The "light internet stalking" one describes 75% of campus.

Man, those were all really good. So many of them, if not all of them to a certain extent, I can relate to. Unfortunately, I can 100% relate to this one (and so can all the people that I tell stories to):

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-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

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This one has perplexed me forever:

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-How the (heck) are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

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They should have a class on that in high school or something. Don't you just end up rolling the sheet around your hands and pressing it flat?

Haha, good point. I usually just end up rolling it in a ball and stuffing it into the closet.

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-There is a great need for sarcasm font.

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true dat

Don't try to keep up with us young people, old man.

We would wedge one game on top of the game we were trying to play to hold it down. Also, remember, there were different ways to blow on the game. You would try the quick forceful blow. If that didn't work you would try the slow, warmer blow (and for those who it applies, which is most of us - get your mind out of the gutter!). Patting the top of the game counsel would work sometimes too.

I would say something about the age range here arch, and how parents just don't understand ...

Anyways, language has always been fluid and modified by each sect, culture, age group that comes around. What is "awesome" and why did it replace "great"? Why don't we speak in "thee" and "thine" anymore? Why is everything a contraction? Because it's considered, if anything, archaic or coquettish. I'm sure your grandparents thought the same about the way "your generation" spoke. Belittling someone because "they talk funny" is a bit, ummm, childish (or old man-ish) I guess.

That one I don't get.

I don't sag as I don't think its fashionable. But, what's the difference between that and some of the stupid fads I'm sure you sported in your days?

I just don't get why the middle aged crowd looks down on what people wear so much now. Like they didn't have ridiculous lookin' fads, too.

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At least I'm not making a stupid correlation between being poor and wearing pants below your ass because they are hand me downs. I see people go into stores and buy pants like that - so the hand me down theory is one of the stupidest I've ever heard.

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I'm sorry you think it's stupid. But it's the truth. Cultures do different things. You grew up differently and part of a different generation than those who started the ghetto fad of drooping pants, so comparing your own life experiences to theirs is moot. The correlation is there, the proof is there, you're unwilling to admit the correctness of it because of your preconceived notions. Get past the differences arch, it's clouding your good judgement and making you look like a bigot.

Ah, so now I'm a bigot. Got it.

Wear your pants under you ass, I will call you stupid and a wannabe.....wannabe what I don't know. I will say that now, next year, in 20 years and in 50 years.

You want to wear your pants hanging off your ass, have at it. If I see you, I'll think you are stupid. I wouldn't hire you for a job. I wouldn't give you a nickel if you begged. If you were starving and came to my door with pants hanging off your ass, I'd feed you as soon as you put the pants where they belong. If you didn't, I'd kick your ass right back out on the street.

Have some respect for yourself.

One other thing that I haven't mentioned: you, or anyone, has the right to have your pants hanging, undies sticking out. No doubt. You have the right to do that.

I have the right to think it's stupid, and the right to think that anyone that does it is stupid and ignorant. And they look dumb, too. But you, or anyone else, can wear their pants however they like.

LOL...sagging pants got old by the end of the late 90's.

It's a typical "trash" (doesn't matter what color) form of dress. It has been since the fad died in the late 90's. The fact that Jnco can't even be found in stores anymore should indicate that.

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Have some respect for yourself.

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Believe me, it has nothing to do with respect for myself. If i had no respect for myself, i wouldn't be at the point in my life that I am right now. So I'll take this time to implore you Arch, have some respect for others!

The definition of a bigot is someone who holds differences against others due to their cultural or societal upbringings. If you don't take my word for it, type in "define:bigot" into google. Your argument matches all half dozen definitions to a T. Regardless of whether you think it's "right" or "logical" to wear your pants where they should be, you still shouldn't hold it against someone and assume that they're trying to be "gangsta," as you said before. For someone so intent on the government not telling it's people how to live, you sure like to tell others how live. I know, you said "You want to wear your pants hanging off your ass, have at it." However, you say that statement and combine it with, "If you were starving and came to my door with pants hanging off your ass, I'd feed you as soon as you put the pants where they belong." So basically, shape up, if you don't, you go out where you belong, with the dogs. How very ... beureaucratic ... of you.

Also, I noticed you've changed your argument from "not believing" to "not caring" about my "theory." So I'll take it that you buy it, or at least admitted that it's possible.

I've always heard that saggy pants came from guys going to prison. They wore their pants lower for ... Umm .. easier access ... I guess is the right way to put it.

Of course that could have just been a way to keep me from wearing my pants like that.

-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

A lot of them are good but this is the one that hits home the strongest with me.

especially when you can't watch streaming vids at work...

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The "fad" caught on because rappers wanted to show their roots and kept it the same.

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They wanted to show thier underwear, Couldnt htye have thought of something diffrent than letting your pants hang down.

I do find it intresting Kids now days wear thier pants around thier ankles and show no crack, us older guys try to keep our pants up, but heck we show more crack than thier is spackle. I came to the conclusion it's not a racial thing or a age thing it's a gender thing, us guys are always looking for reasons to drop our pants, we may blame it on our roots, or something, but it all comes down to we men have to drop our pants in public..

Wow, I go to bed and wake up to see arch in this thread pyulling his usual schtick, why am I not surprised? I wonder if arch and fletch were separated at birth?