ACTUAL AUSTRALIAN COURT DOCKET 12659 ---
CASE OF THE PREGNANT LADY
A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus.
She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her.
She immediately moved to another seat.
This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again.
The man seemed more amused.
When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing,
she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court.
The judge asked the man (about 20 years old)
what he had to say for himself.
The man replied,
'Well your Honor, it was like this:
when the lady got on the bus,
I couldn't help but notice her condition.
She sat down under a sign that said,
'The Double Mint Twins are coming' and I grinned.
Then she moved and sat under a sign that said,
'Logan's Liniment will reduce the swelling,' and I had to smile.
Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said,
'William's Big Stick Did the Trick,' and I could hardly contain myself.
But, Your Honor, when she moved the fourth time
and sat under a sign that said,
'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident!'
... I just lost it.'
'CASE DISMISSED!!'
***
Liu Bolin...The Invisible Man...
This guy paints himself... no trick photography ... no photoshop ...he just paints himself...
Liu Bolin ***
On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident. The couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they begin to wonder: Could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter showed up, they asked him.
St. Peter says, “I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out,” and he leaves.
The couple sat and waited, and waited. Two months passed and the couple is still waiting. As they waited, they discussed that if they were allowed to get married in Heaven, what was the eternal aspect of it all. “What if it
doesn't work?” they wondered, “Are we stuck together forever?”
After yet another month, St. Peter finally returns, looking somewhat bedraggled.
Yes,” he informs the couple tersely, “you can get married in Heaven.”
“Great!” said the couple, “But we were just wondering, what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?”
St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slams his clipboard onto the ground.
“What's wrong?” asked the frightened couple.
“OH, COME ON!”, St. Peter shouts, “It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it'll take me to find a lawyer
