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How ‘Slut Shaming’ Has Been Written Into School Dress Codes Across The Country

By Annie-Rose Strasser and Tara Culp-Ressler on May 6, 2013 at 3:00 pm

Capistrano Valley High's school dance dress code.
Last month, a New Jersey middle school banned girls from wearing strapless dresses to prom. Administrators claimed that the dresses were “distracting” — though they refused to specify exactly how or why. Parents reacted strongly to the rule; some supported the dress code while others deemed it “slut-shaming.” On Friday, the school compromised by allowing girls to wear single-strap or see-through-strap dresses.

This is no isolated incident in the United States. Across the country, young girls are being told what not to wear because it might be a “distraction” for boys, or because adults decide it makes them look “inappropriate.” At its core, every incident has a common thread: Putting the onus on young women to prevent from being ogled or objectified, instead of teaching those responsible to learn to respect a woman’s body. Here are five other recent examples:


1. A middle school in California banned tight pants. At the beginning of last month, a middle school in Northern California began telling girls to avoid wearing pants that are “too tight” because it “distracts the boys.” At a mandatory assembly for just the female students, the middle school girls were told that they’re no longer allowed to wear leggings or yoga pants. “We didn’t think it was fair how we have all these restrictions on our clothing while boys didn’t have to sit through [the assembly] at all,” one student told local press. Some parents also complained, leading the school’s assistant principal to record a voicemail explaining the new policy. “The guiding principle in all dress codes is that the manner in which students dress does not become a distraction in the learning environment,” the message said.

2. A high school principal in Minnesota emailed parents to ask them to cover up their daughters. A principal in Minnetonka, MN recently wrote an email telling parents to stop letting their daughters wear leggings or yoga pants to school. He says the tight-fitting pants are fine with longer shirts but, when worn with a shorter top, a girl’s “backside” can be “too closely defined.” The big risk of having a defined backside, he thinks, is that it can “be highly distracting for other students.”

3. Two girls in Ohio were turned away from their prom for being “improperly dressed.” Laneisha Williams and Nyasia Mitchell were barred from prom this spring for wearing dresses that administrators considered “too revealing.” The girls say that they didn’t believe they were violating a dress code that said dresses couldn’t be too short or show too much cleavage. But one administrator told local news that the high school girls were only allowed to wear dresses that had “no curvature of their breasts showing.”

4. A kindergarten student in Georgia was forced to change her “short” skirt because it was a “distraction to other students.” It’s hard to imagine that a kindergartener’s outfit could be “a distraction to other students,” but a mother in Georgia told locals news there that her daughter had been outfitted in someone else’s pants — without parental permission — after the principal deemed the skirt the young girl was wearing too short.” The girl had apparently wore the skirt, and accompanying leggings, just one week before without incident.

5. Forty high school girls were sent home from a winter dance in California after “degrading” clothing inspections “bordering on sexual harassment.” A school board member’s daughter was among the 40 girls turned away from Capistrano Valley High’s February dance for wearing dresses that either exposed their midriffs or were cut too low. Before the dance, girls were apparently required to flap their arms up and down and turn around for male administrators’ inspection. The school issues image guidelines for appropriate dress on its website — though the images were nearly all of women, and the only male image depicted proper attire. One girl alleges that the principal told her, “Not all dresses look good on certain body shapes.” A grandmother of one of the girls who was turned away from the dance also said that a teacher remarked about her granddaughter, “What mother would allow her daughter to wear a dress like that?” Apparently the school did receive some praise, though, from the parents of two male students.

When most Americans think about “rape culture,” they may think about the Steubenville boys’ defense arguing that an unconscious girl consented to her sexual assault because she “didn’t say no,” the school administrators who choose to protect their star athletes over those boys’ rape victims, or the bullying that led multiple victims of sexual assault to take their own lives. While those incidences of victim-blaming are certainly symptoms of a deeply-rooted rape culture in this country, they’re not the only examples of this dynamic at play. Rape culture is also evident in the attitudes that lead school administrators to treat young girls’ bodies as inherently “distracting” to the boys who simply can’t control themselves. That approach to gender roles simply encourages our youth to assume that sexual crimes must have something to do with women’s “suggestive” clothes or behavior, rather than teaching them that every individual is responsible for respecting others’ bodily autonomy.

i don't get the point of the article

Depends. Have you seen some of the outfits these young girls wear? If they have their parts hanging out, I am all for sending them home. They are supposed to be attending an institute of learning, not a pick up club. They need to dress tasteful.

Simple solution is just abolish all government institutions.

Back in the dark ages, when I went to school, we had a dress code.

I see no problem with restricting what kids wear to school. There is a lot of clothing out there that I would never, ever allow my kid to wear if I were a parent. I see younger girls wearing these skin tight black stretch pants that leave nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing below the waist to the imagination. Sometimes a girl won't be wearing underwear under a pair of those pants, and it's easy to tell. No way would my daughter be allowed to wear these. I might be hated, but it just wouldn't happen. I wouldn't allow my son to wear anything similar if the "style" were reversed. I see no need for a girl to go to school without a bra ...... or in super revealing clothing ..... just as I see no need for a boy to go to school with ripped pants, underwear hanging out, or with a t-shirt that is skin tight. If kids want to dress that way when they are away from school, then that's fine ..... but at school I think there should be a dress code.

The skin tight pants thing kills me, not just school age kids but adults too. I have no problem with the dress codes in schools.

In my daughters school the biggest thing I see is flip flops, they are not allowed, but many kids wear them anyway. My daughter is always saying can I wear them today? And I always say no, but Dad Sara wears them, and my response everytime is I don't care what Sara wears you will not wear them because you are not allowed!

The leggings or yoga pants as everyday pants is really bad. You can literally see the outline of everything they are covering. If those pants were allowed when I was in high school no work would have been done.

A woman in my neighborhood must have a closet of endless black skin tight pants, that is all she ever wears. She is okay on the eyes, so I'm okay with her wearing them, it's a running joke with my wife and me. Is she wearing them today? Yes she is.

As a red blooded male, I don't mind seeing hot looking girls 18+ walking around in those skin tight pants ........ in fact, truth be told, I enjoy them ...... I probably see 30 or so girls dressed like that if I go to Wal Mart or Target ..... and usually about a third of them can pull it off.

I heard 2 girls walking through WalMart the other day talking about some guy who was staring at them ...... and how they just couldn't believe how rude the guy was. (I would have thought they were talking about me, but they were looking in the opposite direction when talking about him)

They were wearing those skin tight black tights, and almost certainly no underwear. I wanted to ask them what they expected guys to do. I would bet that they wore those outfits to get attention from guys ..... and you can't control which guys you get that kind of attention from if you just put it all out there for guys to see.

As a side note ..... I took my Mom to Wal Mart one night, and there were these 2 girls walking around. They were dressed nicely .... but the one girl walk complaining about her shoes, and how they hurt her feet. Her friend asked her why she wore them if they hurt, and the girl said "because they're cute". She was wearing a bell bottom type jeans, and her shoes were almost completely covered. About an inch of the toe, and the point of her heel were showing.

I wanted to say something ..... but I figured that it would just be seen as rude.

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No kidding. A school dress code is far from promoting a rape culture, if that's the point he's trying to make. Personally, I think what children wear is the parent's responsibility.

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Unfortunately, there's so many parents out there that don't seem to care. Some of these things that people wear nowadays are absolutely ridiculous. And some of the prom dresses that girls wear are ridiculous too.

Kids can wear what they want, and that's up to parents. But school is meant for learning. And school functions follow school rules. I have absolutely no problem with dress codes in school.

And I love those Yoga pants like any guy does, but there's no place for them at school. They do distract from learning. School is for learning, not for looking good and impressing

I have 2 daughters, and support dress codes. Even if the school doesnt have a dress code, I do.
I think a dress code also takes a lot of pressure off of kids and parents to buy the latest most expensive trends in clothes.

JC

Well now it's ya'll who sound old. I have always hated dress codes, still hate dress codes, and don't see myself changing my mind any time soon. My great grandparents hated my grandparents clothes, my grandparents hated my parents clothes. My parents hated my clothes, I hate my kids clothes, and my kids are going to hate their kids clothes.

The point of this article is that controlling sexual harassment or worse is most often placed on females rather than males.


How come I can post on this thread now and I couldn't earlier?

I apologize for clogging up the forum with 2 posts on the same subject. If there's a way to combine them and delete one I'd be grateful.

Sorry kingodawg I wasn't implying you didn't know.

I was bouncing back and forth because I kept getting a you gotta use 75 characters message that wouldn't let me post on here, so I just kinda posted when I got the chance. I'm still figuring out how this board works.

There are other posts on here that stated they didn't get it.

I know this will become another conspiracy theory, but how many times have you heard a muslim civilization say something like, the women have to cover up as it's distracting to the men? Islamists are all about enforced morality.

A girl's party dress should be pretty, make her feel good about herself, and have enough modesty to be approved by her overprotective father.

Elizabeth Smart, who was kidnapped and raped for nearly a year when she was 14, never thought about running away from her captor despite having opportunities to do it, and part of the reason had to do with her religious upbringing. The 25-year-old said as much as at a recent forum about human trafficking at Johns Hopkins University:

Smart said she “felt so dirty and so filthy” after she was raped by her captor, and she understands why someone wouldn’t run “because of that alone.”

… [She said] she was raised in a religious household and recalled a school teacher who spoke once about abstinence and compared sex to chewing gum.

“I thought, ‘Oh, my gosh, I’m that chewed up piece of gum, nobody re-chews a piece of gum, you throw it away.’ And that’s how easy it is to feel like you know longer have worth, you know longer have value,” Smart said. “Why would it even be worth screaming out? Why would it even make a difference if you are rescued? Your life still has no value.”

With the latest News about Steubenville and the Miracle in Cleveland I thought these points were interesting.

Elizabeth Smart and the Case Against Christian Abstinence Education

Yea, I'm just talking about how the culture promotes sexual dominance in males and subservience in females with mixed messages about images and slutty behavior.

Just thought since there seems to be a mix of us old people and young people on here that it would be interesting to hear ideas about it.

Us old guys went through the women's lib era and I was wondering how much things have changed.

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The point of this article is that controlling sexual harassment or worse is most often placed on females rather than males.

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There is a difference between controlling it... and not inviting it. I'm not one who has EVER said a girl deserved to be raped because of how she dressed but if not showing half your ass and boobs at a high school dance can help, then don't show them. I was a high school boy once, and a college boy, and a young man, and now an older guy and I can tell you, if a girl is going to stick it out there, I'm going to look at it. And younger boys haven't developed the self-control that most guys develop as they mature...

There are a lot of things we know about human nature, about the differences between males and females, about the differences between teens and more mature adults, etc... and some people continue to act like these things don't exist and that we should just live in some idealistic world where they don't matter.... but they do.

So if a girl is showing half her ass and boobs at a high school dance then she is in some way contributing to whatever happens?

Just so you know we raised 2 girls and I remember giving the speech about the things you do contribute toward your reputation and what people assume about you.

there was a funny joke about the way girls dress from Dave Chappelle

here is the link - don't want to embed because he swears a little bit

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So if a girl is showing half her ass and boobs at a high school dance then she is in some way contributing to whatever happens?

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Contributing? No... and not "whatever happens".. rape is a crime of violence... However if she gets ogled, talked about, and develops a reputation (even if undeserved), then yea, I would say that she brought a lot of that on herself.

Look, if a girl goes to a high school dance and leaves her purse on a table with a $100 bill sticking half way out of it and somebody steals it, would you say she contributed to it? Or at the very least she didn't take reasonable steps to prevent it from being stolen?

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As a side note ..... I took my Mom to Wal Mart one night, and there were these 2 girls walking around. They were dressed nicely .... but the one girl walk complaining about her shoes, and how they hurt her feet. Her friend asked her why she wore them if they hurt, and the girl said "because they're cute". She was wearing a bell bottom type jeans, and her shoes were almost completely covered. About an inch of the toe, and the point of her heel were showing.

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A side note on your side note.... one of my female friends enlightened me recently on this very subject. Apparently, women consider other women much more when choosing their outfits. Counter-intuitive, I know. I found it hard to believe at first, but the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. Girls are primarily dressing to impress each other because it is the female friends who are judging what they wear.

So, here's an unconventional solution to this problem of what girls wear. If you want to change this situation, you are wasting your time focusing on the guys because the girls don't really care all that much what a guy thinks about what they are wearing. They care about what their female peers think about what they are wearing; therefore, affect the female culture around clothing, and you will have a chance at actually doing something productive about these issues.

I don't see it as an attack on women specifically, more like attacking the people who dress like they want to show off their "mommy/daddy bits", and those tend to be women most of the time.

Come on, how many times have you seen guys wearing bike shorts around town? Or a shirt showing their stomach? Men show off their arms and that's about it. Women, sorry "some" women, make it a point to put on clothes to push certain attributes out to the public so everyone can see them ("look at me...but if I catch you starring, I'll give you a dirty look").

I see no problem with this. Just like I see no problem with outlawing flips-flops, obscene t-shirts, booze/drug related clothes, hats or other distracting things in school. It's not Nazi Germany to prohibit what kids wear to school. You want to wear hoochie pants or tops to the mall or grocery store, go for it, but not at school. You have a choice if you want an education.

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Apparently, women consider other women much more when choosing their outfits.

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Mantis, this is an excellent point that I had never considered... I would imagine that there is also some level of competition between the girls for the attention of guys though. Hopefully your wife isn't engaging in that but I would assume high school girls are.

In the end, for me, it comes down to a self-respect/self-confidence thing... what do you want to be noticed for? natural beauty? charm and personality? or heaving boobs? simple fact is that heaving boobs get noticed from across the room, the others usually do not... or perhaps the better question is, why is it so important that everybody notice you.

Personally, I'm not into the heaving boobs ..... I prefer a girl with a nice backside ...... but maybe that's just me ........

Anyway .... women seem to dress in competition with one another.I think that's why there is so much trashy clothing around. Girls want to attract the guys before another girl can, so they get more and more revealing, and more and more provocative.

jc...


You know the ladies on the forum are just PMing back and forth with "These guys, think they got it all figure out, what maroons".

OMG,, I'm 61 years old, went to three proms during my HS years in the late 60's.. Two of my dates wore strapless gowns and they both were attractive.

I'm afraid that I don't know why the school is even messing with this. It's prom