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2nd String
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OP
2nd String
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 288 |
Only rule..(not that all of you will obey it) You must post smack about a player.Try to keep it short and sweet..Of course I'm obliged to start. If I were Gwen Rothlisberger, I would realize that it is not an honor to be award the NFL "Darwin" Award winner!!! 
"Behold! The only thing greater than yourself!"
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Hall of Famer
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Hall of Famer
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If I were a Bengals player, I'd be a wanted man. 
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Steeler
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Steeler
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If I were Crybaby Carson, I would pray to God every night for a way to beat the Steelers (who are their superiors in every way possible) in a game that actually counts instead of an occasional regular season game here and there.
Also, if I were Palmer, I would wonder why I keep telling the news media that the Bungholes are the better team right after they lose.
I mean really....are his brains in his kneecap?
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1st String
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1st String
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Quote:
If I were Crybaby Carson, I would pray to God every night for a way to beat the Steelers (who are their superiors in every way possible) in a game that actually counts instead of an occasional regular season game here and there.
Also, if I were Palmer, I would wonder why I keep telling the news media that the Bungholes are the better team right after they lose.
I mean really....are his brains in his kneecap?
Occasional? The Bengals have beaten the Steelers at Heinze field for two years in a row, at Heinze your home turf, we own you!  
-Med-
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Steeler
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Steeler
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OMG!  The Bungles beat us twice! In meaningless games! You're right, they own the Steelers! sigh 
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Legend
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Legend
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Haven't the Steelers beaten you three times in a row at Paul Brown?
Blue ostriches on crack float on milkshakes between the sidewalk titans of gurglefitz. --YTown
#gmstrong
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Raven
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Raven
Joined: Sep 2006
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Haven't the Steelers beaten you three times in a row at Paul Brown?
And in their "one every 15 year playoff game"?
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2nd String
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OP
2nd String
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 288 |
If I were, Whiine's Ward, I'd stop crying every time the feature me on TV. Remember Whines, there's no crying in football.
"Behold! The only thing greater than yourself!"
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Joined: Oct 2006
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1st String
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1st String
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Quote:
Quote:
If I were Crybaby Carson, I would pray to God every night for a way to beat the Steelers (who are their superiors in every way possible) in a game that actually counts instead of an occasional regular season game here and there.
Also, if I were Palmer, I would wonder why I keep telling the news media that the Bungholes are the better team right after they lose.
I mean really....are his brains in his kneecap?
Occasional? The Bengals have beaten the Steelers at Heinze field for two years in a row, at Heinze your home turf, we own you!
-Med-
Correct me if I'm wrong, last 6 Trips to PB stadium, ALL Steeler wins including 1st round lose with Bungholes up by 10 2X in 05 on our way to SB #5, then again in Final game with Post season on line in 06. LOL LOL
Yep, I'd say we STILL own you even with crybaby Palmer at the helm
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Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
Joined: Oct 2006
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Is that Palmer or Medmann?
[b]USNavyDawg (Ret.) ![[Linked Image from i87.photobucket.com]](http://i87.photobucket.com/albums/k155/brownsfan4173/NFL-Football.jpg)
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Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
Joined: Oct 2006
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Quote:
Quote:
Is that Palmer or Medmann?
I know, I've used that picture of "The Cornholer" before, but it's like Jello...there's ALWAYS room for it!
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Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 11,401 |
Quote:
Is that Palmer or Medmann?
TRICK QUESTION!!! Palmer IS medmann.
Blue ostriches on crack float on milkshakes between the sidewalk titans of gurglefitz. --YTown
#gmstrong
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Joined: Sep 2006
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Rookie
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Rookie
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If I were Jamal Lewis, I would spit in the face of every Browns fan that cheers for me this year. After all the smack the Browns fans talked about the Bengals and Ravens being criminals, they would be nothing but hypocrits to root for me.
If I were Ben Roethlisberger and I had just had the worst season in my entire life as a quarterback, I would still laugh at all the Browns players that have less Super Bowl rings than me.
If I were any Bengals player or if I were Kellen Winslow Jr., I'd shut my man-pleaser until I had actually helped my team win something significant (meaning a Super Bowl.)
But that's just me.
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2nd String
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OP
2nd String
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 288 |
If I were Eric Steinbach, I would be happy that I was grossly overpaid but I almost surely won't be nearly as successful because of this:
Cincinnati Bengals
Player who left: Guard Eric Steinbach (Browns)
Replacement player: Andrew Whitworth
The skinny: Steinbach was a good player who started every game in his four seasons with the Bengals. He will be tough to replace. But Whitworth is a second-year player who played well when he started at left tackle last season for the injured Levi Jones. At 6-7 339 pounds, he is more of a power player than Steinbach, which should help the run game. This is a perfect example of a team being prepared for a veteran
"Behold! The only thing greater than yourself!"
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Joined: Sep 2006
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Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 27,314 |
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If I were Jamal Lewis, If I were Ben Roethlisberger, If I were any Bengals player, if I were Kellen Winslow Jr.
If you were not so ugly everybody wouldn't point, stare, and laugh at you either. 
I AM ALWAYS RIGHT... except when I am wrong.
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Rookie
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Rookie
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If you were not so ugly everybody wouldn't point, stare, and laugh at you either.
Wow, GM. From reading your posts you are one of the last people on this board I would expect to ignore the content of the posted smack and simply resort to a weak, personal attack on a fellow poster. Do you have nothing of substance to contribute to this thread? Are you out of fresh witicisms? As CH would say, "Poor GMDawg. The Clowns Front Office has made you so bitter that your brain functions have been affected. Poor GMDawg indeed." I think I got that about right.
And by the way, people don't laugh at me for being ugly...they laugh at me for being short, fat, and old.
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Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
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By your response, my smack hit the mark so it was effective. As far as being short, fat, and old.......... we could be twins 
I AM ALWAYS RIGHT... except when I am wrong.
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Legend
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Legend
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Did you watch Whitworth last year Curly? I didn't think he was that good...not to say he doesn't have a ton of upside and potential...he just didn't look quite ready yet...did you see improvements or expect him to be ready for this year?
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Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
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It's a Bungleism Phil, y'know, Steinbach left us but he was crap anyways we have a better player waiting in the wing etc etc.
#gmstrong
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Legend
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Legend
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More of a power player, half of the athlete.
Blue ostriches on crack float on milkshakes between the sidewalk titans of gurglefitz. --YTown
#gmstrong
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Joined: Sep 2006
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Hall of Famer
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Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
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Quote:
Quote:
Is that Palmer or Medmann?
I'm guessing it's their lovechild
you had a good run Hank.
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Joined: Sep 2006
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2nd String
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OP
2nd String
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 288 |
Yep!!!! What makes it so much easier for me to accept Steinbach's departure us that if Whitworth doesn't win the job then it will fall to Stacey Andrews who is about as athletic as Steinbach only he weights 362 lbs and runs a 5.9 sec 40. (at least he did when they drafted him) We also have Ben Wilkerson on the roster this year who was the #1 rated College Center 2 years ago and for added flavor we signed good ole OSU boy Alex Stepanovich this year .We have a ton of talent and versatility on the O-line.
"Behold! The only thing greater than yourself!"
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Legend
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Legend
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Was Step a FA or did you guys trade for him?
Blue ostriches on crack float on milkshakes between the sidewalk titans of gurglefitz. --YTown
#gmstrong
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Joined: Mar 2007
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All Pro
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All Pro
Joined: Mar 2007
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If I were Ron Mexico, I would have bought Gardasil the day it came out
![[Linked Image]](http://www.dawgtalkers.net/uploads/captainphil/browns bills sig 5.jpg) When it gets cold and snows and the wind blows, you gotta be able to run the ball. - TR
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Hall of Famer
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Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,651 |
Quote:
Yep!!!!
What makes it so much easier for me to accept Steinbach's departure us that if Whitworth doesn't win the job then it will fall to Stacey Andrews who is about as athletic as Steinbach only he weights 362 lbs and runs a 5.9 sec 40. (at least he did when they drafted him) We also have Ben Wilkerson on the roster this year who was the #1 rated College Center 2 years ago and for added flavor we signed good ole OSU boy Alex Stepanovich this year .We have a ton of talent and versatility on the O-line.
Wilkerson has a blown out knee and was on the practice squad last year. Even the Browns passed on him in favor of a #5 guard Matua. Given the Browns saga at Center last year, even they could not pick him up.
Stepanovich .. you mean another failed arizona draft choice?
Welcome back, Joe, we missed you!
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2nd String
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OP
2nd String
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 288 |
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Wilkerson has a blown out knee and was on the practice squad last year.
No..Rich Braham got hurt and Wilkerson took his place last season. He was the #2 Center for the Bengals and made a short apperances..He was signed as a UDFA 2 yrs ago. His knee is no longer a concern.
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Stepanovich .. you mean another failed arizona draft choice?
If thats how you want to label him then go ahead. All I know is a few people here said you guys should try to sign him. He said its always been his dream to play in Cincy and once they called he considered no other offers. 1 yr deal. Pure Center..Ghiaciuc and Wilkerson can play guard or center...Gotta love the depth
"Behold! The only thing greater than yourself!"
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Joined: Sep 2006
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Legend
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Legend
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Do you have "proof" that we said that?
Blue ostriches on crack float on milkshakes between the sidewalk titans of gurglefitz. --YTown
#gmstrong
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Joined: Jan 2007
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1st String
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1st String
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Quote:
Yep!!!!
What makes it so much easier for me to accept Steinbach's departure us that if Whitworth doesn't win the job then it will fall to Stacey Andrews who is about as athletic as Steinbach only he weights 362 lbs and runs a 5.9 sec 40. (at least he did when they drafted him) We also have Ben Wilkerson on the roster this year who was the #1 rated College Center 2 years ago and for added flavor we signed good ole OSU boy Alex Stepanovich this year .We have a ton of talent and versatility on the O-line.
If Whitworth or Andrews was better than Steinbach they would have started instead of him.
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2nd String
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OP
2nd String
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 288 |
Quote:
If Whitworth or Andrews was better than Steinbach they would have started instead of him.
Who said they were better???? I said the depth the Bengals possess makes it much easier for me to accept Steinbach leaving....
You may now return, to you offbeat train of thought.....geezzz...
"Behold! The only thing greater than yourself!"
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Practice Squad
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Practice Squad
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Posts: 156 |
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Quote:
If Whitworth or Andrews was better than Steinbach they would have started instead of him.
Who said they were better???? I said the depth the Bengals possess makes it much easier for me to accept Steinbach leaving....
You may now return, to you offbeat train of thought.....geezzz...
Guess that puts you where we used to be , Great depth, but it all sucks.
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2nd String
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2nd String
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 288 |
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Guess that puts you where we used to be , Great depth, but it all sucks.
Where you used to be?????
Ummm no one outside of this board is pimping you O-line as top of anything...What has happened is you finally got a few competent players instead of a bunch of off the heap bums to play o-line for a change...And frankly, your depth on that line, flat out sucks....
They should definitely be better but don't go too far off the deep end just yet..
"Behold! The only thing greater than yourself!"
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Posts: 396
All Pro
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All Pro
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The Bengals anticipated Steinbach leaving via free agency before the 2006 Draft. The Bengals instead of committing large dollars to Eric, put their money in their bookend tackles. Guards are important to a o-line,but a OT can make or break your o-line. In essence,OG's are kinda interchangable.
In any event,your OT's should make more money than your OG's cause thats the nature of the position.
To protect themselves,Marvin Lewis drafted Andrew Whitworth,who basically can fill Steinbach's shoes at less money.
Who's the better guard,Eric or Andrew..all on perception I guess.
I do know the Bengals were less than thrilled with Steinbach's run blocking last season.
Eric's probally more techically proficent and agile than Whitworth.But Andrew is more of a mauler and more physical.
I think the Browns overpaid as do alot of football observers,but the Andruzzi/Coleman experiment just wasn't working out. The Browns had to upgrade.
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Hall of Famer
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Hall of Famer
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Quote:
The Browns had to upgrade.
And they did just that . Now lets get them through camp without a season ending injury. Not ready to annoint them the new Hogs just yet but as a Browns fan I am giddy with hope that at least we will have a competitive line this year. 
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Rookie
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If I was DShell31 I wouldn't troll the Dawgtalker boards and only post worthless babble on the Squeelers boards with the rest of the mindless drones.
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All Pro
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All Pro
Joined: Sep 2006
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Quote:
Do you have nothing of substance to contribute to this thread?
yeah, i hate when people come on to these smack threads and don't post something constructive. . .
![[Linked Image from s84.photobucket.com]](http://s84.photobucket.com/albums/k4/okphi1124/th_untitled.jpg) WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!WOOF!
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DawgTalkers.net
Forums DawgTalk The Smack Shack AFCN "If I were" smack thread
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![[Linked Image from media.scout.com]](http://media.scout.com/media/avatars/1/6/GlennChannell.jpg)
