DawgTalkers.net Forums DawgTalk Tailgate Forum 14 Yr. Old Teen Who Hit SUV With Eggs Is Slain

what about a 3/4? lol just kidding <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I have a 4 almost 5 year old son he has pushed me many many many times to my limits and then pushed me further. I think there was one time I wanted to smack his ass.... I didn't but I yelled at him walked out cooled off and then came back in and explained myself. I know it has to be hard on him to be an only child with a single dad. I got what you would call abuse when I was a kid. I vowed never to do that to my son. I think there is a difference between getting into trouble and abuse. Abuse is hitting your child because you can and you do it whenever you want without a specific reason. Teaching them a lesson when they do something wrong should only be reseved for when they do things they know are wrong.

Spanking works very well when done correctly....

the parent has to do the spanking immediatly after the act is done... the parents also need to talk with the child so that they know why they are being spanked... and good parents also make sure that they show love to the child as well... I'm not for the delayed spanking... the whole 'wait until your dad gets home' thing. And as always... positive re-inforcement is the best. But I do think spanking is affective if done correctly.

but I digress.

Wow, your father spanked you once and it left that much of a scar? I kind of draw the line with what the intent of the punishment is. Striking in anger is not right, and I also agree that there is an age limit. I think my kids were too old for spnkings at around 5 or 6. But punishment needs to be punishment. If something can be taken away, or even if a lecture can impart the fact that an action was wrong, and give an incentive to not do it again, that is quite significant. Each parent has their own right to dicipline their children (within limits of course) how they feel works. It may surprise you a little to know that I actually specialized in determining thresholds for abuse of children and some of what I've done has been published in medical journals. I even know that not too long ago, child abuse was prosecuted by the SPCA using animal cruelty statutes. I'm very sensitive to the abuse and neglect of children. In my mind, it's neglectful not to punish children. Spanking my daughter's but when she tries to climb the cabinets to streal candy is my attempt to show her that that action has a negative consequence. She doesn't comprehend complex thoughts such as "time out" or explanations on what could happen. She does learn, after a few times that if she climbs, she gets a spank. It keeps her off the counters and will hopefully prevent her from falling off them and breaking her neck.

Hmm.. I didn't beat my kids, I prolly spanked them maybe 3 times all told (usually when they were told not to do something and did it anyways or if they did something that endangered themselves or others such as running into the street after a ball.) I used timeouts and other forms of punishment and they turned out just fine. They seem to respect me, they get good grades and they seem well liked by their friends.

I don't see the need to beat up little kids and use my size advantage. Then again, I do agree with beating up snotty dirty rotten squealer kids <img src="/images/graemlins/thumbsup.gif" alt="" />

My point exactly. Well written. It's been fun, now it's time to go to the bar for the game. After we lose I'm going to drive around and beat some kids up for no reason <img src="/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />.

I'm not hitting my son not will I ever
I don't hate my parents
I don't fear my parents
I respect my parents but that was because they admitted they made mistakes

The word abuse should only be reseved for situations where childen are beat for no reason. Had I only gotten my ass kicked when I made mistakes I would never call it abuse.

Thats OK Cristy, next time we can switch roles <img src="/images/graemlins/naughtydevil.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

The best thing you can say to your children when you punish them is not... go go to your room and think about what you did... ( you are reinforcing the negative of what they did and then they are visualizing what happened)

If you say...

Go to your room and think about what you could have done differntly...
(they visualize what they should of done and therefor they are visualizing the positive not the negative)
then after the time you set aside for them to think about is up... you walk in and have a discussion about it.

Trust me I've done both. I get much better responses from my son andf he actually learns from most of his mistakes.

But hey... I'm 25 what do I know right?

Hitting is hitting. Whether it's a smack on the butt, a smack on the hand, or a smack on the face....it's still hitting, and you're doing nothing but teaching your child to hit.

I think what SOME of you are doing is trying to rationalize your horrible behavior. Face it, you're taking the easy way out when you hit a child. It means that you're too lazy to discipline your child the right way. Either that, or you're a physically violent person to begin with.

So, which is it?

are you talking to me?

I know I don't have the resaerch on it... but i'll be a butt...



Got research to back that up? <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

either way... you have research for both sides of this issue.

Your Dad spanked you ONCE and you hate him for it . Good Lord by that measure I should hate my Granmothers corpse because when we were kids she wailed us all the time . Well, we were ornery kids . See, my grandma was a built in baby sitter for me and my many cousins and she was an old hillbilly lady who was by no means your typical milk and cookies grandma. She used to hit us/at us with any and all things handy from the old hotwheels racetracks to dishrags, spatulas and if we were real unlucky the belt. She even made the mistake once of telling me to go get her a switch to beat my ass with....well, even as an 8 year old kid my self preservation instincts kicked in and I played in the woods all day until it was time for my Dad to pick me up . A mistake she never repeated . We actually get together and make jokes about it now laughing at the thoughts of a little old lady with an orange racetrack. As for my 13 year old daughter, she has been spnaked with my hand less than half a dozen times and all before the age of 8 . More pain is caused by me taking away the computer , ipods or God Forbid the phone ( that is what constitutes abuse in this house ) for a week . She is a typical teenager although better than most IMO .

<img src="/images/graemlins/thumbsup.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/thumbsup.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/thumbsup.gif" alt="" /> My parents use to spanked me..... I am greatful for them caring enough to keep me (somewhat <img src="/images/graemlins/naughtydevil.gif" alt="" /> ) in line, and I love them to death. I used the belt on my own children (they have both grown into wonderful young adults) Punching a child, slapping a child in the face, twisting a childs arm, pushing and shoving a kid are all child abuse IMO, but a butt whipping when the kids know they are going to get it, and know why they are getting it are needed from time to time. I don't ever remember having to spank either of my children after the age of 8 or 9 because they knew what would happened, and didn't push the limits.

No I wasn't....sorry about that. I just happened to click on your name.

Nope, just using common sense.

LOL.. In general, I don't agree with spankings, beatings etc.. but.. I guess Crusty knows better how to raise a child and we should all do it the "right" way.. Crusty's way Pffft..

Crusty, we need to check with you first before we parent. LMAO.. what an egotistical squealer.

A spanking is not a beating . Jeesh you think the love games you and GM play would have pointed that out by now . A beating is what the Steelers are taking this year and as a Browns fan I am well versed in what constitutes a beating .

You should be checking with me before you do anything, Saint.

By the way, Saint....you didn't actually reproduce, did you?

Oohhhh lorrrrd.... <img src="/images/graemlins/rolleyes1.gif" alt="" />

Drop dead.

Hows that for checking with you?

Thanks a lot for bringing your pus filled little cockroaches into this world.

<img src="/images/graemlins/plthumbsdown.gif" alt="" />

So I'm either lazy or violent... Hmm, nice choice.

What exactly do you recommend? Do you have any children? Is there something in your past that makes you feel this way? You cite "common sense" rather than facts. I don't know, I can't judge you, but I know that there are people with this type of sentiment who are far closer to part of the problem than part of any type of solution.

Kids who don't fear consequences can easily end up dead. Parents who try to become their childre's "friend" instead of their parent are more dangerous than those who use corporal punishment within reason.

What are we talking about here ? The kid or the egg? Maybe the guy should have just shot the egg out of the kids hand! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/azzangel.gif" alt="" />

It's NEITHER <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> If you think spanking your own child is easy, your dead wrong. It's a very tough thing to do, but when you love somebody you do whats best for them, not whats best for you.

Spanking isn't what's "best" for any child.

Saint - you're a freakin waste of time. Always dishing it out, but can never take it.

Shadow - there are MANY alternatives to spanking. Try picking up a book on child rearing. And to answer your question, yes I have 2 kids, and no I never spanked them.

Have a nice day everyone

everyone is diffferent...

See thats the thing GM..

While I don't pretend to know it all like some and tell people what to do and how to raise their kids the "right" way. I raise mine the way I am comfortable and that for 99% of the time does not include spankings, beatings etc.. You are free to raise your kids the way you wish to and I won't have the audicity to interfere nor will I tell you how to do different.. I may think what you're doing is the wrong way but thats no crime.

Now, If anyone else were to touch, or hit or beat my kids that will bring a much different response from me.

It's kinder than making them see steelers gear in their home <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Aww Crusty.. you're cryin!

<img src="/images/graemlins/rofl.gif" alt="" />

The problem is everyone takes everythign too extreme.... Child abuse should be ONLY considered when you hit a child for things for no reason or not a good enough reason. Spankings should be ok with disgression. The problem is you have ever a-hole lawyer in the world trying to make disgression not an option. Laws make it so if you hit it's abuse... that my friends is Garbage.

I typically don't respond to threads like this. The ignorance on the football threads drives me crazy, so I sure as hell don't want to discuss life issues w/some of you. And soup........I know I promised not to respond to any of your posts, but this one is too much.

A teenager was killed. You responded:



How does a dead kid learn anything? <img src="/images/graemlins/saywhat.gif" alt="" /> Jesus, that is the dumbest and most insensitive thing I have ever heard on the boards.

You later said that a severe beating for all the teens would be in order. <<sigh>>

I do believe that the teens should have been punished. And not the new way age of just talking to them. However, killing someone is not an option. Nor is a severe beating.

I think such acts should be dealt with by having the offenders pay for the damages. And no...the parents should not have to pay. The teens should have to "work off their debt." They should also perform community service and be given a curfew while receiving counseling.

I am NOT for overlooking a crime, no matter how young the offender is. But to say that killing the offender is a good lesson is reprehensible. To say that severe beatings are in order is wrong.

Sometimes..........I am sickened by some of you.

Well quit looking at my ass, and you should start feeling better <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

LOL.............kinda hard not to see it. It's like a solar eclipse.

But seriously........can you believe that he said that killing the teen would teach him a lesson? <img src="/images/graemlins/saywhat.gif" alt="" />

And hardly anyone is really saying anything about that. Man, I sometimes think the entire world has gone insane. <img src="/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

I don't think Soup was saying the dead kid will learn anything but his friends and other kids will.. It teaches that for any action they do, there can be a bad reaction to it.. In this case, a kid was shot and killed.. sad but the shooter hopefully will see his bad reaction as well.

As for the spanking/ no spanking issue.. my nieces and nephews from my old brother were raised on timeouts and they are the most behaved kids in the world.

... just commenting here, I took the comment to mean that it would teach the other kids, as in I bet they're litterally 'scared straight' from this.

Well, since I'm lazy and violent. I'm either too tired to pick up a book, or I'm affraid I might hit my kids on the head with it. So maybe you should do it for me.

I love people who assume they know what I have or haven't done in the course of raising my FOUR kids. I love how some people are so superior that everyone else must be wrong. Even though the studies I have read seem to find more problems with children who aren't spanked.

One size fits all works only in socks.

Each child has a different learning and emotional maturity level.

Each parent has a different learning and emotional maturity level also.

A parent should never HAVE TO scream at a child if they have talked to their child calmly and reached that kid inside. Sometimes it doesn't work out for whatever reason.

Then new mwthods must be employes...sometimes the silent treatment...sometimes home restriction...sometimes no phone...but the end action is pain.

Avoid at all costs but....each child has different levels of "on and off" capability.

And that makes killing an egg-throwing 14 year old okay????? <img src="/images/graemlins/saywhat.gif" alt="" />

Okay........I'm outta here. I should have known better to discuss anything other than football w/you guys.

Vers..

You said that not many of us were talking about that statement.. I guess I didn't comment on "killing" the kid for throwing an egg because it was just a ridiculous statement that answering it was more than it deserved.

How a dead person will "learn" anything is beyond me. Yes, the kid deserved to be punished but something more appropriate would have served. Having said that I advocate murder charges being brought against the shooter.

The only acceptable defense would be the kid was wearing a Bettis jersey. <img src="/images/graemlins/naughtydevil.gif" alt="" />