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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 14,740 Likes: 928
Legend
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OP
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 14,740 Likes: 928 |
You're at a posh dinner party/event reception.
Tons of people from different walks of life are in attendance. Libations are flowing, faces are glowing, open conversation's ongoing. But you're in a salty, mischievous mood. You find yourself in a conversation, and someone asks, "what do you do for living?"
The challenge: Poorly describe what you do for a living in one sentence.
Your answer begins, "I get paid to..."
I already know what my answer would be, but I'm much more interested in hearing from the rest of you. I'll drop my submission in later.
3...2...1... submit.
"too many notes, not enough music-"
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 49,976 Likes: 356
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 49,976 Likes: 356 |
I get paid to .... do too much work for the biggest boss ever.
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
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1 member likes this:
Clemdawg |
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 8,681 Likes: 386
Hall of Famer
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Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 8,681 Likes: 386 |
I formerly aided people’s deaths. Currently, I make stuff out of other stuff.
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1 member likes this:
Clemdawg |
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,267 Likes: 168
Hall of Famer
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Hall of Famer
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,267 Likes: 168 |
I make drinking water from crap. And proud of it.
There will be no playoffs. Can’t play with who we have out there and compounding it with garbage playcalling and worse execution. We don’t have good skill players on offense period. Browns 20 - Bears 17.
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1 member likes this:
Clemdawg |
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 18,846 Likes: 951
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 18,846 Likes: 951 |
I get paid to prove to people why they have to pay money to the folks they owe it to.
And into the forest I go, to lose my mind and find my soul. - John Muir
#GMSTRONG
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 16,746 Likes: 396
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 16,746 Likes: 396 |
I get paid to work…sort of.
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 14,932 Likes: 114
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 14,932 Likes: 114 |
I get paid by selling stuff for more than I paid for it.
A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives. – Jackie Robinson
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,246 Likes: 204
Hall of Famer
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Hall of Famer
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,246 Likes: 204 |
I get paid to watch bad people
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Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 1,190 Likes: 89
Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 1,190 Likes: 89 |
When I was still drinking: " I get paid to keep my mind afloat."
Now-a-Days: "I get paid to last until retirement".
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 14,506 Likes: 1023
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 14,506 Likes: 1023 |
I don't get paid anymore.
I use to convince businesses to buy stuff that helped them convince other businesses that they were worthy.
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 26,821 Likes: 460
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 26,821 Likes: 460 |
I get paid to be Faster than a speeding bullet! More powerful than a locomotive! Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound!
I AM ALWAYS RIGHT... except when I am wrong.
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1 member likes this:
jfanent |
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Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 2,567 Likes: 147
Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 2,567 Likes: 147 |
At 16 years old I got a job washing dishes after people ate. Didn't care for that.......
At roughly 16.5 years of age I got a job trimming, washing and stacking fruits and vegetables for consumer purchase and consumption.
At roughly 22 years of age as an "Assistant Produce Manager" I assisted the produce manager on all aspects of the operation.
At roughly 25, 26 years of age I became a "Produce Department" manager directly responsible for all aspects of the Produce department.
At roughly 30-32 years of age I became a "Produce Department supervisor/specialist, directly responsible for roughly 12-ish produce departments operations.
At roughly 40 years old I became an "asst store manager", assisting the General Store Manager on all aspects of the business.
At roughly 45 years of age I assisted myself as I became a "General Store Manager" only answering to the "higher ups" at Corp headquarters.
Let this sink in..... On 12-31-23 it be will 123123. On the flip side, you can tune a piano but you can't tune-a-fish.
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 14,740 Likes: 928
Legend
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OP
Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 14,740 Likes: 928 |
I get paid to make noise by dragging a horse's azz hairs across stretched sheep's intestines.
"too many notes, not enough music-"
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Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,910 Likes: 60
Dawg Talker
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Dawg Talker
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,910 Likes: 60 |
i make chicken salad out of chicken [censored]
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 12,839 Likes: 274
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 12,839 Likes: 274 |
I write stuff -about almost anything really - and take pictures of old folks, kids and adults playing sports, houses burning to the ground, old folks working at soup kitchens, ladling soup, and occasionally interview semi-famous people: three Canadian prime ministers and about a dozen hockey hall of famers, a couple of them legendary, and people who aren’t famous but have interesting stories of their own to tell. It’s a good thing I can string a few sentences together because it’s the only thing that I do well enough that people will give me money to do it.
gmstrong ----------------- 2023: The year we got a legit D.
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 10,839 Likes: 107
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 10,839 Likes: 107 |
I have gotten paid for making toilets, scabbing in a brass foundry, teaching, gardening, tending bar, writing, bar DJ, and landscaping to name a few. Then I retired, and I found out that I could get paid for that.
Since then, being retired is what I have done best, it pays well enough, and I have decided to stick with it, thanks for asking.
"Every responsibility implies opportunity, and every opportunity implies responsibility." Otis Allen Glazebrook, 1880
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 14,477 Likes: 162
Legend
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Legend
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 14,477 Likes: 162 |
<><
#gmstrong
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