A father buys a lie detector that makes a loud beep whenever somebody tells a lie. His son comes home in the afternoon. Father asks him, “So, you were at school today, right?” Son: “Yeah.” Detector: “Beep.“ Son: “OK, OK, I was at the movies.” Detector: “Beep.” Son: “Alright, I went for a beer with my friends.” Father: “What?! At your age, I wouldn’t touch alcohol!“ Detector: “Beep.” Mother laughs: “Ha! He really is your son!” Detector: “Beep.”
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
That looks like a regular fish if you put it in it's super high pressured environment, of several thousand feet deep in the ocean. If it's what I think it is.
I was watching a show earlier of some kids gathered around a film of some guys relating what they did on an outdoors trip. I thought how far can this go.
How straight is the roadway to the right of the picture, and how much farther back should the no trucks sign be, if the roadway is curved to allow for it to be seen before the road hazard. Trucking companies only let the better drivers drive tankers so they are usually safer less likely to end up in a ditch, unless of course, there is an unforeseen hazard due to a wrongly warned roadway.
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
That is an hilarious bit. I love how hard they each struggle to keep a straight face. Classic bit right there.
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)
1. The engagement ring; A time when you see that bright future ahead and life looks so optimistic for the two of you as a couple.
2. The wedding ring; A moment in time when your love is so strong that you make a vow of love and loyalty to someone you fully intend to spend the rest of your life with.
3. The suffering; Everything that is coming your way after the wedding ring.
Intoducing for The Cleveland Browns, Quarterback Deshawn "The Predator" Watson. He will also be the one to choose your next head coach.
Steve and Sarah accidentally run over a rabbit in their car. The rabbit is badly hurt, but Sarah quickly takes out a can and sprays it. Suddenly, the rabbit gets up and gives them a wave. They watch as it hops off, still waving its paws. Steve looks at the spray can. It says:‘Hair spray – restores life to dead hair and adds permanent wave’
I was reading some of the junk Microsoft Edge throws at me, and discovered that the internet shorthand for Wonder Woman 1984 is WW84. That is rather close to W84.
1. #GMstrong 2. "I'm just trying to be the best Nick I can be." ~ Nick Chubb 3. Forgive me Elf, I didn’t have faith. ~ Tulsa 4. ClemenZa #1
I always kinda read it "Da Man's shot" (just messin' with ya)
Micah 6:8; He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
John 14:19 Jesus said: Because I live, you also will live.
It took a minute of thought for where this should go, then it seemed obvious...
Tennessee Titans CB Janoris Jenkins says his Rolls-Royce was stolen from airport parking lot
6:34 PM ET Turron Davenport ESPN
NASHVILLE, Tenn. -- Tennessee Titans cornerback Janoris Jenkins returned from a trip to West Palm Beach, Florida, to find his 2016 Rolls-Royce Wraith was stolen from Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport in Atlanta. Jenkins reported the car missing on Wednesday.
Jenkins said he parked the $250,000 vehicle in the south economy lot at Hartsfield-Jackson on May 5 before catching the flight to Florida.
According to Jenkins, no one has any idea as to the whereabouts of the vehicle. Jenkins said he felt mistreated by the staff at the airport.
"They gave me the complete runaround!" Jenkins said via social media.
"The airport was in no way, shape or form empathetic, concerned or in shock that something like this could even happen."
Jenkins said he has contacted the Atlanta police about the vehicle theft.
During lunch at work a woman ate 3 plates of baked beans. When she got home her husband seemed excited to her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the dinner table. She took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a garbage dump! She took her napkin from her lap and fanned the air around herself vigorously. Then, shifting to the other leg she ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping her ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on releasing atomic bombs like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable! Eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of her freedom, so she quickly fanned the air a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her lap and folded her hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with herself. Her face must have been the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked her if she had peaked through the blindfold, and she assured him she had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table, with their hands to their noses, chorused, "Happy Birthday!"
